IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line chart illustrates the amount of money in US dollars paid on cars in China, Vietnam, Thailand, and Indonesia from the years 1995 until 2005.

The line chart illustrates the amount of money in US dollars paid on cars in China, Vietnam, Thailand, and Indonesia from the years 1995 until 2005.
#line #amount #money #dollars #cars #china #vietnam #thailand #indonesia #years
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
This
 chart depicts the amount of money that had been spent
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
 US dollars on books
four
Change preposition
in four
show examples
country
Change to a plural noun
countries
show examples
 ( Germany,
France
, Italy, and Austria) in the
years
between1995
Correct your spelling
between 1995
 and 2005.
Overall
, Germany showed the
upmost
Correct your spelling
utmost
show examples
 result all over these
years
,
while
 the least amount of money
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 spent
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 books in Austria;
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 it saw
Correct article usage
a significantly
show examples
significantly
Change the word
significant
show examples
 change till 2005.
Likewise
,
France
 and Italy illustrated steadily rising over 10
years
. At the outset, in 1995 the greatest amount of money ( 80
million
 dollars) was spent by
Germany
Correct your spelling
German
show examples
 people,
as well as
this
 index
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased dramatically until 2005( almost 100
million
).
Moreover
, in
Austria
Add a comma
,Austria
show examples
this
 number was noted with the least point(30
million
), had risen a bit (approximately 10
million
) in 1991 and from 2001 it went up
a
Change preposition
to a
show examples
peak with 70
million
 over 4
years
.
Furthermore
, by spending close amounts in 1995,
France
 and Italy had climbed maximum till 70
million
(
France
) and 60
million
(Italy).
Submitted by shabnam.aghayeva on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words france, years, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • line chart
  • amount of money
  • paid on cars
  • China
  • Vietnam
  • Thailand
  • Indonesia
  • 1995
  • 2005
  • significant increase
  • highest amount
  • steady growth
  • lowest overall spending
  • started at
  • doubled
  • nearly
  • reached
  • exceeded
  • among
  • half a billion dollars
  • conclusion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: