The charts below show the percentage of people working in different sectors in town A and town B in 1960, 2010.

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The charts illustrate the distribution of workers in three different sectors in

town

Use synonyms

A and

town

Use synonyms

in 1960,

2010

Correct word choice

and 2010

show examples

Overall

Linking Words

,Manufacturing was the dominant in 1960 for Towan A and in 2010

services

Use synonyms

were the most popular. In

town

Use synonyms

, manufacturing accounted for the majority percentage of workers in 1960 and 2010.In 1960,

services

Use synonyms

accounted for the least proportion for both

town

Use synonyms

A and

town

Use synonyms

. In 2010, the

sales

Use synonyms

occupied the least proportion for

town

Use synonyms

A and

town

Use synonyms

. In 1960, Manufacturing presented nearly two fifth for

town

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

sales

Use synonyms

accounted for one-third and

services

Use synonyms

reported just under a third. For

town

Use synonyms

, Manufacturing presented less than three quarters,

while

Linking Words

both

sales

Use synonyms

and

services

Use synonyms

accounted for only one-third of the total proportion. In 2010,

services

Use synonyms

accounted for approximately 65%

while

Linking Words

manufacturing reported only a fifth in

town

Use synonyms

A.For

town

Use synonyms

, manufacturing accounted roughly 60%,

while

Linking Words

both

sales

Use synonyms

and

services

Use synonyms

represented under half .

fmalquran112Fri Jul 14 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words town, b, services, sales with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "presented" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.

▼

2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

153 words

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The charts below show the percentage of people working in different sectors in town A and town B in 1960, 2010.

Sources of electrocity in four countries 2003-2008

In the past, people stored knowledge in books. Nowadays, people store knowledge on the internet. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?