IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In some nations, the authorities cover the partial or entire educational fees for children in order to make literacy affordable. I believe the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.

#nations #authorities #fees #children #literacy
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Educated
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An educated
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society
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 is very important for every
country
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's growth. The future of a
country
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 depends largely on that. Many countries pay the educational expenses of the
children
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 of their
country
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 partially or fully to make schooling affordable, and I believe
positive
Correct article usage
the positive
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 impacts are more when compared to the negatives. Considering
firstly
Linking Words
 the negatives of free
education
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, an important one is the devaluation of
education
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 among
the
Correct article usage
apply
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students.
This
Linking Words
 is because it reduces the sincere approach to studies from the
children
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 as they are not answerable to their
parents
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 as they are not funding their studies. In
case
Correct article usage
the case
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 of
education
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 funded by
parents
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children
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 will have a moral responsibility to study well as they are studying with hard earned money
of
Change preposition
by
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 their
parents
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. Contract with
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
Use synonyms
government funded
Add a hyphen
government-funded
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 studies, the
government
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 would not be able
look
Add the particle
to look
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 after the study interests of every
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children
Change to a singular noun
child
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wgich
Correct your spelling
which
 would affect the quality of
education
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.
However
Linking Words
, it is the responsibility of every
government
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 to make sure their future generations receive proper
education
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.
This
Linking Words
 is because every nation depends on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technological advancements and infrastructure developments which is possible only through an educated
society
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.
For instance
Linking Words
,
Finland
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Finland's
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government
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 provides free
education
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 to all their citizens which resulted in massive growth for
their
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the
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country
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 both
technological
Change the word
technologically
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 wise
as well as
Linking Words
infrastructure wise
Add a hyphen
infrastructure-wise
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.
The free
Correct article usage
Free
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education
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 would
also
Linking Words
 provide an equal
oppurtunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 to
children
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 from all classes of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
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 and
this
Linking Words
 would
also
Linking Words
 help to eliminate the
discriminations
Fix the agreement mistake
discrimination
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
.
Conversely
Linking Words
, if the
parents
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 needed to fund their
children
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's
education
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 the quality of
education
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 will be different for the different classes of the
society
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. In conclusion, the advantage of growth of the
country
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 and reducing the
discriminations
Fix the agreement mistake
discrimination
show examples
 among its citizens outweigh the disadvantage of depreciating the value of
education
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by jaikrishnavijay on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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