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Writing Samples
Band 6

The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories during 2015 amd 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make compparisons where relevent.

The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories during 2015 amd 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make compparisons where relevent.
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The chart depicts the amount of money a
country's
Change noun form
country
show examples
 exports in different product categories from 2015 to 2016. The table illustrates the comparison of two
years’s
Remove the s
years’
show examples
 percentage change in values. It is obvious the percentage of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Petroleum products and engineered goods is the two highest in both 2015 and 2016 among the five categories,
while
Linking Words
 the
figure
Use synonyms
 for textiles in change has the highest. In
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
show examples
, earnings from exporting Petroleum
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 scored the top one place,
contributed
Wrong verb form
contributing
show examples
 over 60
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 in both
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
.
Gemsand
Correct your spelling
Gems and
 jewellery
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 the only
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
category out of five that show a
dowenard
Correct your spelling
downward
 trend in the
figure
Use synonyms
, from approximately 42 per cent
2015
Change preposition
in 2015
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
show examples
 in values. The
figure
Use synonyms
 for textiles has increased dramatically from 2015 to 2016,
contributed
Wrong verb form
contributing
show examples
 15.24 per cent of
rise
Correct article usage
the rise
show examples
 comparing the two years. The percentage of the increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 agricultural products is the lowest(0.8%), which is the only
figure
Use synonyms
 that
lower
Change the verb form
lowers
show examples
 1 per cent of growth among the other categories.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words figure with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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