The person information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations do you think the advantages of this outweigh disadvantages

#person #information #individuals #internet #companies #organisations #outweigh

It is undeniable that in

this

technological era, several enormous firms have the confidential data of numerous people;

however

,I believe that the drawbacks of

this

trend out shadow the benefits and

this

essay will demonstrate my consideration in upcoming paragraphs. On the one hand, sizeable companies can provide relevant information to the citizens.

In other words

,by having the personal details of internet users,firms can bestow their results as per their search history,preference and needs.

For example

,consider Amazon,which starts to show products to customers,

according to

their surfing history.

As a result

,the customers' time

Add the comma(s)

, as well as effort,

show examples

as well as

effort are saved.

On the other hand

,these can do fraud with the concerned citizens.To justify,the banking details

along with

private pictures can be exposed to the public by unauthorized access to info.

For instance

,the passwords of e-mails

as well as

I'ds can be misused by firms.

Additionally

,with the help of credit card info,these can borrow

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

funds of people easily.

Consequently

,the knowledge of individuals can spread on the internet within seconds.

To conclude

although

organizations can demonstrate relevant knowledge to surfers by knowing their details,I believe that

this

can lead to fraud in terms of stealing money

together with

exposing the information on the internet.

Submitted by sandhuprabh090 on Tue Jul 18 2023

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

192 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The person information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations do you think the advantages of this outweigh disadvantages

Include an introduction and conclusion

These days many families move abrod for work. Some people believe that this benefits the children in these families. Other believe that it makes their lives more difficult. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in -What are the reasons for this? -How can people research this?

Many people assume that the goal of every country should be to produce more materials and goods. To what extent do you agree or disagree that constantly increasing production is an appropriate goals?

Having a good university degree guarantees people good job. a To what extent do you agree?

Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?