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Band 2.5

The bar chart supplies the amount of people in UK countries now, in 1985 and in the future, 50 years after.

#bar #supplies #amount #people #uk #countries #future #years
The bar chart supplies the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
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 of people in UK countries now, in 1985 and in the future, 50 years after. So, here it is considering the population aged 65 and over , in order to
this
 the chart shows
:
Remove the comma
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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England, Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland and
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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 itself. It is interesting to note that, the average
persentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 in the eighties is about 14% ,
however
 in fifty years it won't have big changes by having almost the same average as 24
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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. Compared with the other four, the highest population is in Wales, as in
85s
Correct article usage
the 85s
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 so its 35s in
Correct article usage
the 21s
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21s
Correct your spelling
21st
 century. The figures
is
Change the verb form
are
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 just over fifteen now and
twenty five
Add a hyphen
twenty-five
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 after. What about the lowest? Northern Ireland has had not a big population ,
therefore
 the results by 2035 won't have a much difference.
Also
 , even though
that
Correct word choice
apply
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England and UK
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
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had the same percentage
as
Change preposition
of
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 15 , by the time. the prediction says
,
Remove the comma
apply
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they will have the same 13% of citizenries as Northern Ireland. Indeed, the number of people in each country
undoubtably
Correct your spelling
undoubtedly
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 will increase in these years,
however
, the finals can be different. Some of them may end up in the same way,others can have
sharp
Correct article usage
a sharp
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 rise, who knows.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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