IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

A government’s role is only to provide defence capability and urban infrastructure (roads, water supplies, etc.). All other services (education, health, social security) should be provided by private groups or individuals in the community. Do you agree or disagree with the statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#government’s #role #defence #capability #infrastructure #roads #water #supplies #services #education #health #security #groups #individuals #community
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Any private groups or individuals in the community are undoubtedly playing a huge role in protecting and giving
services
 on education, health and social security in places where people need it the most. But it does not seem to be enough as to some extent, they might have limited resources of man and goods. It is not the private groups or the community but the
government
 to be held accountable. As mentioned before, the public should be able to obtain many
services
 related to public interests provided by the
government
. The
services
 are supposed to be various, not only in defence capability and urban infrastructure, but
also
 health, education, and social security
services
.
For instance
, in the education field, subsidized school fees will help children with poor financial status to keep their academic status, at least until they reach the high school year. Meanwhile, in the health field, enough stocks of medicine and nutritious food can prevent stunting, a condition where children grow physically and mentally slower compared to kids around their age. Some aid from the
government
 could help with the problems explained above. The
government
 is supposed to give the right public
services
 from the very beginning.
According to
 the relationship between the
government
 and the public itself, the public has the right to demand things from the
government
. In return, the
government
 should be able to meet the needs of its people as part of its responsibility. After all, without the support from the public, the
government
 would not exist at all. It is very important for a good
government
 to have the rightful synergy with the public in order to provide the best
services
 for its people.
Submitted by sigit.yuniar on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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