nowadays, more people are migrating to other countries than ever before. In order to become integrated into society in therir adopted countries, immigrants should abandon their old ways and adapt to local customs and codes of behaviour

#people #countries #society #therir #immigrants #customs #codes #behaviour

Moving into a foreign nation has significantly increased as compared to the past, Some people believe that

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to be a part of these countries, they should not follow their traditional

customs

and rituals.

Although

, I believe people should respect the local culture, where they choose to live, but

also

, follow their own rituals and

customs

To begin

with, people are deciding to move to another state for various reasons, one of the major reasons is improving their lifestyle. It is evident that

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many second-world citizens dream to settle in Western countries, to avail luxuries.

Secondly

, when they arrive in their dream country, they feel uncomfortable in the beginning,

due to

the language barrier. Though

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they feel disconnected from

the

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society, and for that reason mix up with new culture, even if they are not aware of their practices, follow blindly and ignore their own traditional

customs

Nevertheless

, it is not necessary to forget your own rituals

as well as

their importance.

Instead

, they may provide information about their festivals, inviting locals when they are celebrating,

thus

they understand the value of practices, which will make our community diverse. To illustrate, Isckon is a religious organisation, that built many temples across most of the western countries. They not only invite local residents to function but

also

, spread the message of Lord Krishna, how we should live our life. In conclusion, I believe governments, who invite foreign citizens to in their country provide support in various ways

such

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free coaching for local language, local

customs

and many more, so that they easily

amalgamating

Wrong verb form

amalgamate

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with the local population.

Furthermore

, locals

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, as well as migrants,

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as well as

migrants should put efforts to understand each other cultures and respect them.

Submitted by harshtrivedi78 on Tue Jul 25 2023

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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nowadays, more people are migrating to other countries than ever before. In order to become integrated into society in therir adopted countries, immigrants should abandon their old ways and adapt to local customs and codes of behaviour

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

: Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the punishment. Why are this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent to free time activitiy of young people. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some people think government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems to help prevent illness and diseas. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Everybody should donate a fixed amount of their income to support charity. How far do you share this viewpoint?

In some countries ,children have very strict rule of behavior,while in other countries they are allowed to do anything they want .to what extent children have to follow rules? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples .