In spite of the many advances women have made in education and employment, they continue to be at a disadvantage when it comes to pay and promotion. In your view, what should be done to promote equality of opportunity for men and women in the workplace?
Women
nowadays have more chances to get further
education and have good job opportunities like
Change preposition
apply
men
than before
. Rephrase
apply
Nevertheless
, they could also
resolve many problems of gender inequality in work such
as low paid
, Replace the word
pay
difficult
Replace the word
difficulty
to
Change preposition
in
promote
and many others that Replace the word
promotion
makes
them restricted Change the verb form
make
to succeed
in their fields. Change preposition
from succeeding
Therefore
, it needs to enforce principal effort
to make greater equality.
No one can deny the fact that the government could take the lead by promoting the same number of Fix the agreement mistake
efforts
men
and women
in parliament. It can encourage the confidence of women
employment in companies as well as
give their competition to become normal. So that it could establish the socially-advanced models and reduce gender inequality in the world. A better example is that many billionaires themselves are women
and it is convincing evidence of women
’s ability. However
, this
process needs persistence and time because it takes much effort and quite long to have a consequence.
It can also
be argued that the rank and average earning
of Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
men
and women
would
be published by Verb problem
should
the
organizations and researchers to clear the present situation and promote fair pay in society. Correct article usage
apply
In addition
, the role of productivity has become more important now, so earning the same amount of equivalent work is a way to encourage equality in the workplace. However
, some figures in many articles are just a side of the problem, so it is important to have critical thinking when reading them.
In conclusion, to have gender equality, the government must set a good example as well
as
both employees and employers Correct word choice
and
also
tackle action. Rephrase
apply
Moreover
, concern about the information of figure salary between men
and women
. It is a very difficult journey but the result is also
worth it.Submitted by sinh.ielts on
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task response
Ensure that all aspects of the prompt are fully addressed and supported with relevant examples.
coherence cohesion
Work on providing a more clear and cohesive flow of ideas throughout the essay. Use transition words to link ideas and paragraphs.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary, use more varied and precise words to express ideas.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar. Vary sentence structures and use complex sentences for a higher score.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...