IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the graph show the amount of money spent on book in Germany , France , Italy and Austria between 1995 and 2005.

the graph show the amount of money spent on book in Germany , France , Italy and Austria between 1995 and 2005.
#show #amount #money #book #germany #france #austria
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line graph describes the cost had been paid
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 books in four different
country
Change to a plural noun
countries
show examples
 from 1995 to 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, we can see Germany was the highest
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
four
Correct article usage
the four
show examples
 countries.
Whereas
Linking Words
 Austria was the lowest but in the
last
Linking Words
 period it was higher than Italy. The amount of money spent on books was
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 sharply in four countries. Looking at the figure in
further
Linking Words
 detail , we can see Germany started at 80 million $,after which it experienced
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
growth to 90 million $ in 1999. And
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 4 years I
was fell
Change the verb form
fell
show examples
 slowly to roughly 85
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 $, before ending the period at 95
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 $. The amount of France started at roughly 55
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 $ , after which it
rocket
Wrong verb form
rocketed
show examples
 to roughly 75
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 $ in
ending
Add an article
the ending
show examples
 period. Turning to the remaining, Italy started at 50 million $ and next 4 years It
wasn’t change
Change the verb form
wasn’t changed
wasn’t changing
show examples
. In 2005 it jumped quickly to around 60 to 70
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 $, after which it experienced a rise to 40
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 $ in 1999. Next 2 years it
wasn’t change
Change the verb form
wasn’t changed
wasn’t changing
show examples
. In 2005 it went quickly to 70
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 $ was higher than Italy.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words millions with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: