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Band 4.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph and chart below give information on the average daily maximum and minimum temperatures in degrees Celsius (°C) and the average number of days with rainfall each month for two Australian cities. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph and chart below give information on the average daily maximum and minimum temperatures in degrees Celsius (°C) and the average number of days with rainfall each month for two Australian cities. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#minutes #information #temperatures #degrees #celsius #°c #rainfall #month #two #australian #cities #report #university #lecturer #summarise #features #comparisons
The chart illustrates the
tempereture
Correct your spelling
temperature
diference
Correct your spelling
difference
 in each
days
Change to a singular noun
day
show examples
since
Change preposition
from
show examples
 January to December in two Australian cities and
bar
Add an article
the bar
show examples
 chart shows the number of
days
 of
rainfall
 in each
month
.
According to
 the data, the
temperature
 has
reported
Add a missing verb
been reported
show examples
 in
celcius
Correct your spelling
celsius
degrees
 and
selected
Correct article usage
the selected
show examples
 places were
Brisband
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Brisbane
 and
Canbera
Correct your spelling
Canberra
. It is
obvoius
Correct your spelling
obvious
 that
Brisband
Correct your spelling
Brisbane
 was the warmest city throughout the year.
According to
 the chart,in January,
Brisband
Correct your spelling
Brisbane
 and
Canbera
Correct your spelling
Canberra
 had nearly
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
temperature
although
 both of these cities had huge
descrepancy
Correct your spelling
discrepancy
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
temperature
 in each
days
Change to a singular noun
day
show examples
. At
Brisband
Correct your spelling
Brisbane
,
maximum
Add an article
the maximum
show examples
temperature
 was just below 30 and
minimum
Add an article
the minimum
show examples
 was just above 20 in January
while
Canbera
Correct your spelling
Canberra
 had the highest value just below Brisbrand and the lowest value
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
between 10-15.
However
, in
following
Add an article
the following
show examples
month
,
Brisband
Correct your spelling
Brisbane
 had their peak level of
temperature
 as 30
degrees
 and 10
degrees
diference
Correct your spelling
difference
 was the
loweat
Correct your spelling
lowest
 level.
Canbera
Correct your spelling
Canberra
 had
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
 line of maximum and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lowest
temperature
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
month
.
In addition
,
Brisband
Correct your spelling
Brisbane
 had the lowest
temperature
 in July and August and
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 was 10 whilst
Canbera
Correct your spelling
Canberra
 had just above 0 in June and July. In December, both cities were hot because they reached nearly 30
degrees
 as highest with huge fluctuations in each
months
Change to a singular noun
month
show examples
.
Secondly
,
Brisband
Correct your spelling
Brisbane
 had
highest
Add an article
the highest
show examples
rainfall
 in February and March and there was a reduction of rain in June, July and August and it
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased when reached in December up to 12
days
.
Canbera
Correct your spelling
Canberra
 had 10
days
 per
month
 as maximum numbers in June, July and August
while
 other months had
Add an article
the
show examples
nearly
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 number of
days
 of
rainfall
. It is very clear that
Brisband
Correct your spelling
Brisbane
 had more
rainfall
 than
Canbera
Correct your spelling
Canberra
 in
whole
Correct article usage
the whole
show examples
 year
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
 each and every
month
 there were more
days
 than
Canbera
.
Submitted by shanikanir86 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to, while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words days, rainfall, month, temperature, degrees, brisband, canbera with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just below" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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