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Writing Samples
Band 5

Discipline is an ever-increasing problem in modern schools. Some people think that discipline should be the responsibility of teachers, while others think that this is a role of parents. Discuss both the sides and give your opinion.

#discipline #schools #people #responsibility #teachers #role #parents
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In today’s trend discipline is becoming an increasingly serious issue;
According to
 some
people
Add a comma
,people
show examples
teachers
 are greatly responsible for
discipline
Add an article
the discipline
show examples
 of
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
children
a child
show examples
children
,
while
 on the other side
argues
Correct subject-verb agreement
argue
show examples
 that it is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 role of
parents
. Even though
teachers
 are responsible for disciplining a student,
but
Correct word choice
apply
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parents
 are the one who plays a major role in
upcoming
Correct article usage
the upcoming
show examples
 of every individual.
Children
 often
replicates
Change the verb form
replicate
show examples
 the
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 they observe from their mother and father. Nowadays, modern
schools
 face
increasing
Add an article
an increasing
show examples
 number of disciplinary issues.
Children
spends
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
 most of their time in school so it is obvious that
responsibility
Correct article usage
the responsibility
show examples
 of disciplining a kid
rely
Correct subject-verb agreement
relies
show examples
 on
teachers
.
Furthermore
,
schools
 should
also
 adhere to
certain
Add an article
a certain
show examples
set
Fix the agreement mistake
sets
show examples
 of rules relating to
disciplinary
Correct article usage
the disciplinary
show examples
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 of a student.
For instance
, ragging seems to be an offensive crime in
schools
 these days. By following strong disciplinary procedures,
schools
 can stop
such
 innocent pupils from being affected by
this
. Unequivocally, every individual grew up
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
observing their family members, so
majority
Add an article
the majority
show examples
 of their
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 resembles
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
theirs
show examples
.
Parents
 can easily identify the wrongdoing of a kid and immediately take strict action on it to rectify their mistakes.
For Example
, nowadays with an arising
case
Fix the agreement mistake
cases
show examples
 of sexual
assaults
Fix the agreement mistake
assault
show examples
parents
 play an important role in educating about good and bad touch to their
children
. In conclusion, even though
teachers
 have
responsibility
Add an article
the responsibility
show examples
 of disciplining a child
but
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the primary motto is on
parents
’ shoulders. Because
teachers
 could not able to overlook each and every individual since they are responsible for
quite
Change the article
quite a
a quite
show examples
 large number of students in a class,
also
 they have certain limitations on each and every kid, But the main responsibility of a teacher is to notify any wrongdoing of student to their
parents
.
Therefore
, it is up to the
parents
 to set
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 example for their
children
 and teach them how to behave properly.
Submitted by vyshu.bakkiam on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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