The pie chart shows the percentage of persons arrested in five years ending 1994 and the bar chart shows the most recent reasons for arrests.

The pie chart shows the percentage of persons arrested in five years ending 1994 and the bar chart shows the most recent reasons for arrests.
The pie chart
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
information about the
percentage
of
persons
Replace the word
people
show examples
who
arrested
Add a missing verb
were arrested
show examples
in
five
Correct article usage
the five
show examples
years ending 1994 and the bar chart shows data about the main recent reasons for arrests.
Overall
, arrested
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
males
have
percentage
Correct article usage
a percentage
show examples
higher than
arrested
Correct pronoun usage
those arrested
show examples
with
females
.
Moreover
, persons arrested in five years ending 1994 for
females
and
males
with public drinking the highest. It can be seen from the pie chart that
males
have
arrested
Add a missing verb
been arrested
show examples
with 32% less than
not
Correct pronoun usage
those not
show examples
arrested with 68%
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
not arrested
females
and higher than arrested
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
just
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
9%.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
not
aressted
Correct your spelling
arrested
for
females
have 91
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
, it is the highest
percentage
. It can be seen from the graph that public drinking is
the
Change preposition
at the
show examples
top with both
males
and
females
but
females
higher
Add a missing verb
are higher
show examples
than
males
.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
drink driving
Add a hyphen
drink-driving
show examples
males
higher
Add a missing verb
are higher
show examples
than
drink
Wrong verb form
drunk
show examples
driving
females
. The next, breach of
orther
Correct your spelling
other
for
males
higher than
Add an article
a
show examples
breach of
orther
Correct your spelling
other
for
females
.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 93%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, males, females with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: