IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The given graph presents the percentage of women unemployment in each country of the United Kingdom in 2013 and 2014.

The given graph presents the percentage of women unemployment in each country of the United Kingdom in 2013 and 2014.
The given graph presents the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
women
Use synonyms
unemployment
Replace the word
unemployed
show examples
 in each country of the United Kingdom in 2013 and 2014.
According to
Linking Words
 the information,England shows the
most
Change the adjective
apply
show examples
highest unemployment
rate
Use synonyms
,
however
Linking Words
 in
Nothern
Correct your spelling
Northern
show examples
 Ireland the
rate
Use synonyms
 is not big.
Generally
Add a comma
,Generally
show examples
 the
persentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of unemployment decreased in all countries,except
Scotland
Use synonyms
. In 2013 6,8% of England
women
Use synonyms
 were unemployed,but
this
Linking Words
rate
Use synonyms
 decreased only to 0,3% in 2014. As we can see,
Scotland
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 shows the same
rate
Use synonyms
 as England. In comparison with Wales in 2013 the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of Nothern Ireland was higher
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 0,2%. The lowest amount of
percentage
Use synonyms
 was in
Nothern
Correct your spelling
Northern
show examples
 Ireland, in 2014 there were 4,6% of
women
Use synonyms
 were unemployed,
also
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
rate
Use synonyms
 in Wales was not big only 5.0%.
Lastly
Linking Words
,in 2013 the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of non-working
women
Use synonyms
 in
Scotland
Use synonyms
 was 6,1%,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
this
Linking Words
increaed
Correct your spelling
increased
 by 0,6 in 2014. As can be seen from the graph,the amount of
unepmloyment
Correct your spelling
unemployment
women
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 in 2014 dropped slightly
than
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2013 in all countries
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but rose slightly in
Scotland
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, however".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, women, rate, scotland with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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