IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below gave information about the people use public library and the main reasons to visit in Britain in 1991 in 2000.

The chart below gave information about the people use public library and the main reasons to visit in Britain in 1991 in 2000.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The pie charts
presenting
Wrong verb form
present
show examples
 the percentages of
people
Use synonyms
 who came to
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
 library and some main reasons why they visited in Britain in 1991 and 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, in both these two years,
people
Use synonyms
 mostly came to public
libraries
Use synonyms
 to borrow or return
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the percentage of
people
Use synonyms
 who studied and read
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
 or
magazine
Fix the agreement mistake
magazines
show examples
 in 1991 and 2000
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 the least. In 1991, it can be observed that more than
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of
percentages
Correct article usage
the percentages
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 borrow or return books in public
libraries
Use synonyms
, around 65%. What’s more, 15% of visitors to those
libraries
Use synonyms
 just for reading newspapers or magazines. It can be
argured
Correct your spelling
argued
 that there was
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
10% of
people
Use synonyms
 studied and obtained information in Public
libraries
Use synonyms
. Looking
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the remaining figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the year 2000, there was 55%
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
 who borrowed or returned books
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
libraries
Use synonyms
. 20% of visitors obtained information and 15% of them came to
libraries
Use synonyms
 to borrow or return videos. On the one hand, there was a small number of
people
Use synonyms
came
Correct pronoun usage
who came
show examples
 to
libraries
Use synonyms
 to read newspapers or
magazine
Fix the agreement mistake
magazines
show examples
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
around 5% and only 2% studied.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, libraries with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: