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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graphs below show the number of men and women in full and part-time employment in Australia between 1973 and 1993.

The graphs below show the number of men and women in full and part-time employment in Australia between 1973 and 1993.
#graphs #show #men #women #employment #australia
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The four line graphs illustrate the percentage of full and part-time
employment
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 of both genders in different age groups in Australia between 1973 and 1993. There were 90% and 80% of
males
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 who aged 20 to 50 years old worked
in
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apply
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full-time in 1973 and 1993 respectively.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the percentage of part-time
males
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 dropped significantly over 20-year-olds in 1973 and 1993.
However
Linking Words
, About 10% of elderly
males
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 tended to
had
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have
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 a part-time job in 1973. Two decades later, the percentage dropped to 5%. When it came to females, it is worth
to notice
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noticing
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 that there were peaks in the line graph of full-time females at age 20. More than half go the women had full-time jobs when they were 20 years old.
In addition
Linking Words
, both full and part-time
employment
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 rates in 1973 and 1993 share similar patterns. There was a negative relationship between the full-time
employment
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 rates of women and their ages.
Also
Linking Words
, part-time employees were teenagers of both genders and women aged 25 to 50.
Overall
Linking Words
, the line graphs displayed
a
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apply
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growth in all rates during
two
Correct article usage
the two
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 decades, except for the full-time
employment
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 rate of men.
Although
Linking Words
 more
males
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 were employed full-time in Australia, females participated in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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part-time
employment
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.
Submitted by BeckyJ on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words employment, males with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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