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Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people think that planting trees in open spaces in cities and towns is more important than building houses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #trees #spaces #cities #towns #houses
In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern society, some
people
 believe that planting greens
outdoor
Replace the word
outdoors
show examples
 in the urban area is more vital than constructing
house
Add an article
a house
the house
show examples
. In my opinion, I
am strongly agree
Change the verb form
strongly agree
show examples
 with
this
 notion and in the
further
 paragraphs will be discussed details to support my agreement before a conclusion is reached It is certainly true that
trees
 can help
people
 to improve their
health
.
This
 is because every plant can be reduced the pollution in the air by producing more oxygen.
For instance
,
people
 who live in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rural
areas
 have more ages than
the
Correct determiner usage
those
show examples
urban
Change preposition
in urban
show examples
areas
 because outside
areas
 have more
trees
 than
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
, but the
orther
Correct your spelling
others
 have more
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
 than
greens
Fix the agreement mistake
green
show examples
.
As a result
,
Trees
 can be helped
people
both
Change preposition
in both
show examples
 physical and mental
healths
Fix the agreement mistake
health
show examples
 by producing more oxygen in the air.
Nevertheless
, developing houses is important to contribute to the economy's growth, which means an increase
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 building is an essential
impact
 on developing countries. To
iullstrate
Correct your spelling
illustrate
, the development city as NewYork City
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 more
hight-rise
Correct your spelling
high-rise
show examples
 building than
trees
.
Consequently
,
to develop
Change the verb form
developing
show examples
 more buildings
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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only
impact
Correct subject-verb agreement
impacts
show examples
 on economy's growth, but
no
Add a missing verb
has no
show examples
 straight
impact
 on individuals. In conclusion,
although
 developing houses in urban
areas
 is important for economic
impact
, planting more
trees
 is much more essential to help
people
 both physical and mental
health
 as
desence
Correct your spelling
defence
health
 is the most vital thing in
people
's life.
Therefore
, I strongly agree that
people
 should be planting more greens to produce more oxygen to reduce or recover their
health
 issues in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
city life.
Submitted by cat_dudick on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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