IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The Bar graph below shows the Expenditure in Million Pounds on fast food items by income groups in the UK in 1990.

The Bar graph below shows the Expenditure in Million Pounds on fast food items by income groups in the UK in 1990.
The Bar graph below shows the expenditure in
Million
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Pounds
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 on fast food items by
income
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 groups in the UK including
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hamburger
Fix the agreement mistake
hamburgers
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, fish and
chips
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, pizza
Overall
Linking Words
,
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hamburger
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hamburgers
show examples
 the famous for
people
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 with high
income
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 and average
income
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.
Whrease
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Whereas
chips
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 were
people
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 with low
income
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 bought the most In terms of two food,
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
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the most expensed
hamburger
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people
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 with high
income
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 spend
lot
Change the article
a lot
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 of money on
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hamburger
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hamburgers
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with
Change preposition
apply
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45
million
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pounds
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.
Next,
Linking Words
people
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 with high
income
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 spend about 35
million
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pounds
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 on
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hamburger
Fix the agreement mistake
hamburgers
show examples
. In
constract
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contrast
,
people
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 with low
income
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 spend about 15
million
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pounds
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 on
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hamburger
Fix the agreement mistake
hamburgers
show examples
. With regard to fish and
chips
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people
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 with average
income
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 spend 25
million
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pounds
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 on fish and
chips
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. Meanwhile,
people
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 with high
income
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 and low
income
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 spend about 15
million
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pounds
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 About pizza
people
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 with high
income
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 spend about 20
million
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pounds
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.
People
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 with average
income
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 spend half of
Correct your spelling
people
pepole
Correct your spelling
people
 with high
income
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while
Linking Words
people
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low
Change preposition
with low
show examples
income
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 spend ⅓ of
people
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 with
average
Add an article
an average
the average
show examples
income
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words million, pounds, income, hamburger, chips, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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