IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The map below show a transformation of a book store in the year 2000 and now.

The map below show a transformation of a book store in the year 2000 and now.
The illustration below
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 a transformation of a
book store
Correct your spelling
bookstore
show examples
 in the year 2000 and now.
Overall
Linking Words
, there
a
Add a missing verb
are a
show examples
great number of changes over time, especially
arrangement
Correct article usage
the arrangement
show examples
 of the different genres. In 2000, there was a large
section
Use synonyms
 of
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
fiction
books
Use synonyms
 on the left side of the bookstore.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 that
section
Use synonyms
 was parted
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 four new sections, like art, hobbies, cookery and fiction are now demonstrated.
Following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, the area for fiction
books
Use synonyms
 in the rear corner
now
Add a missing verb
is now
show examples
 used for non-fiction
books
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 the older
section
Use synonyms
 of non-fiction has now been used for a cafe. In the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 of the room, art, hobbies and cookery were located,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 in the next twenty
years
Add a comma
,years
show examples
this
Linking Words
 place changed by tables and chairs. Meantime, the places of travel
section
Use synonyms
, new
books
Use synonyms
 and the service desk are still unchanged over the period.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words section, books with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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