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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Scientists tell us some activities are good for health and others are bad. Despite knowing that million of people continue doing unhealthy activities. What are the causes and what are the solutions?

#scientists #activities #health #million #people
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There are controversial perspectiveS heating UP a debate over how to live
healthy
Change the adjective
healthily
show examples
.
While
Linking Words
 scientists claim that there are a wealth of
activities
Use synonyms
 suitable
with
Change preposition
for
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 people’s health, some opposites still act
bad
Change preposition
like bad
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activities
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay is devoted to the underlying roots, followed by some equivalent effective solutions to
this
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 alarming problem. Without a shadow of a doubt, a large number of useful
advices
Change the wording
advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
show examples
 from professional experts,
however
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, people ignore them and have numerous harmful
activities
Use synonyms
, especially smoking.
This
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 is because people have a tendency to use
smoke
Use synonyms
 in order to decrease stress when they have been under pressure in their lives.
Moreover
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, the low price of
Use synonyms
smoke
Wrong verb form
smoking
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 is one of the reasons for
this
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 problem.
For example
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, Vietnamese man utilize
smoke
Use synonyms
 with high frequency from young to old age because of anxiety in their work and every
smoke
Use synonyms
 is fifteen thousand Viet Nam Dong.
Hence
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, the price and the bad habit of
user
Correct article usage
the user
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 are common justifications.
While
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 the reasons
are widely acknowledge
Change the verb form
are widely acknowledged
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, it is necessary to introduce far-reaching solutions for troubles. The government acts as
precursor
Add an article
a precursor
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 in minimizing
this
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 negative status.
For example
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, the Viet Nam governor give some rules to limit it
such
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 as
:
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apply
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 increasing
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
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 for
smoke
Use synonyms
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
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 and so on.
Moreover
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society projects are one of the most efficient resolutions.
For instance
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, in Thailand, tremendous state advert about the negative impacts of
smoke
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
Add an article
the user
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user
Fix the agreement mistake
users
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 and surrounding
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
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 with the aim of decreasing it.
Thus
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, rising
smoke
Use synonyms
 tax and
advertising intensive
Add a hyphen
advertising-intensive
show examples
 effects of it should be done
due to
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 people’s health. In conclusion, it is vital for people to increase awareness of bad
activities
Use synonyms
, especially smoking.
In addition
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, the government and state have
main
Add an article
the main
show examples
 responsibility for their
residents’s
Remove the s
residents’
show examples
 well-being.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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