Working hours today are too long and people are not spending as much time as they should with their families or on leisure activities. What Is your opinion on this?

The amount of
time
people spend at
work
during the day increases drastically which results in having less
time
for their loved ones and hobbies. From my perspective,
that is
a true statement.
In addition
, the necessity of having more money leads to more stress which results in mental issues which might be moderated by leisure activities.
Further
, I will elaborate on
this
topic. As a mother of three, as far as I am concerned, families struggle to find the
time
for themselves or for their leisure activities.
However
, in
Slovakia
Add a comma
,Slovakia
show examples
maternity leave tends to
last
up to 3 years. Despite it’s astonishing that mothers can spend these most precious moments with their babies, every benefit comes with its negative side.
Due to
complete
Correct article usage
the complete
show examples
loss of one salary, the sole breadwinner, usually a father, has to
work
long hours. A father tired from
work
, and a mother frustrated with
everyday
Correct article usage
the everyday
show examples
monotony of life without self-realization, both without
time
for themselves, leads to unhappiness.
On the other hand
, from the beginning of mankind, it was common for people to
work
hard manually for hours daily. The transition in professions results in a different form of tiredness.
Whereas
in the past, physical fatigue was common, these days, the mental one is in the course. Even though there’s an excess of everything, the living costs are tremendous and fear of losing a roof over your head occurs often.
Thus
working overtime is not uncommon.
As a consequence
, there’s a need for relaxation usually in the form of sports, when not only the mind can recover from tough stressful days but
also
the body can eventually use its potential. To briefly conclude, I believe it is crucial for families to prioritize shared moments.
Furthermore
, the importance of having
time
for your own hobbies shouldn’t be forgotten. I wish everyone could afford decent living and healthcare
as well as
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
live a happy life.
Submitted by accounting on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: