nowdays, more teenagers want to become famous actors or singers. why do you think this is happening? is this a positive or negative development?

#nowdays #teenagers #actors #singers #development

nowadays, many

people

want to be famous with the development of social

media

. becoming famous is easy to gain.

Hower

Correct your spelling

However

show examples

people

who become well

know

Wrong verb form

known

show examples

too fast

sometiomes

Correct your spelling

sometimes

make problems with their famous. In my opinion,

this

Correct your spelling

a negative development. platforms

Change the verb form

are

show examples

gain

Change the form of the verb

gaining

show examples

many

succes

Correct your spelling

success

. Many teenagers, even

elderly

Correct article usage

the elderly

show examples

spend their time

to use

Change the verb form

using

show examples

social

media

so much on a daily routine. So many

videoes

Wrong verb form

videos

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

uploading

Wrong verb form

uploaded

show examples

on social

media

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

facebook, youtube, tik tok,... it many ways to be famous and very easy to do

this

with

the

Correct article usage

show examples

smartphone and little skills edit video. Social

media

land

Correct article usage

a land

show examples

peole

Correct your spelling

people

make

Correct pronoun usage

who make

show examples

their dream to be

Add an article

an idol

show examples

idol

Fix the agreement mistake

idols

show examples

. They can

comfortable

Change the adjective

comfortably

show examples

show their personality to attract followers or they

performance

Replace the word

perform

show examples

their

talened

Correct your spelling

talented

talent

. Or even they can post a daily routine and many like

this

. But many

people

have

Add a missing verb

do have

show examples

not a

luckily

Capitalize word

Luckily

show examples

, they try to make everything to be famous but they cannot. So they decide a way very

bad

Change the word

badly

show examples

that

is post

Change the verb form

posts

show examples

the video is not unhealthy.

This

video

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

everyone angry and attract

million

Change the article

a million

show examples

views. they

Change the verb form

are

show examples

given

Change the article

show examples

enomours

Correct your spelling

enormous

success and raise very much money with no investing too much and no effort. After they had received many

critizm

Correct your spelling

criticism

critics

from many

people

, they began

apologetic

Change the adjective

apologetically

show examples

and ask for forgiveness that they do. They promised that will change and

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

be better and receive

many

Correct quantifier usage

much

show examples

sympathy from everyone.

Lastly

, they become famous and earn

many

Replace the quantifier

much

show examples

money.

This

trend

repeat

Change the verb form

repeats

show examples

so much that

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

community

Correct article usage

the community

show examples

network

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

fed up with what famous do. Becoming

idol

Fix the agreement mistake

idols

show examples

too fast that they face up many

problem

Change to a plural noun

problems

show examples

. They do not

training

Change the verb form

train

show examples

professionally and have a mistake.

Therefore

, they

Change the verb form

are

show examples

violented

Change preposition

show examples

the internet. they put up with

highly

Change the word

high

show examples

pressure and

intolerable

Add a missing verb

are intolerable

show examples

. They

decide

Add the particle

todecide

show examples

end up with their life. in conclusion, with

development

Correct article usage

the development

show examples

of platforms, becoming famous is easy to

success

Replace the word

succeed

show examples

than

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

past. But, it

give

Change the verb form

gives

show examples

many hapless.

Submitted by tram.vomy on Fri Aug 18 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
52Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

314 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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nowdays, more teenagers want to become famous actors or singers. why do you think this is happening? is this a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries young people have less leisure time and under a lot of pressure to work hard in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

While many people go to university for academic study, more people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. Do you agree or disagree?

many people say that we have developed into a throw away culture because we are filing up our environment with so many plastic bags and rubbish that we can't fully dispose of . to what extent do u agree with this opinion and what measures can you recommend reducing this problem.