The pie graphs below show the result of a survey of children's activities. The first graph shows the cultural and leisure activities that boys participate in, whereas the second graph shows the activities in which the girls participate.

#graphs #show #survey #children #activities #first #leisure #boys #second #girls

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These two pie graphs illustrate the information about children's

activities

Use synonyms

. The first figure shows the cultural

activities

Use synonyms

that

boys

Use synonyms

like the most,

while

Linking Words

the second graph presents the cultural and leisure

activities

Use synonyms

that

girls

Use synonyms

do.

However

Linking Words

it is clear that

Linking Words

the

girls

Use synonyms

like to do outdoor games in their leisure time

as well as

Linking Words

indoor

activities

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

the

boys

Use synonyms

are more interested in the outdoors than indoors. The percentage of

boys

Use synonyms

who like to read is the lowest amount shown by the pie chart at 2%,

whereas

Linking Words

21% of

girls

Use synonyms

like reading.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the percentage of children who listening music is the same on both two sides at 10%.

Although

Linking Words

both

girls

Use synonyms

and

boys

Use synonyms

are interested in computer games.

Although

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

only

boys

Use synonyms

play skateboarding, soccer and basketball,

nevertheless

Linking Words

netball, gymnastic, and dancing are only famous among

girls

Use synonyms

. Most

girls

Use synonyms

choose dancing as

the

Correct article usage

show examples

cultural and leisure activity at 27%.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, 26% of

boys

Use synonyms

play basketball.

Submitted by skn on Fri Aug 18 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although, while".

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words activities, boys, girls with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

158 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

survey
cultural activities
leisure activities
participate
percentage
gender difference
similar participation rates
traditional gender roles
trends
impact
parental influence
extracurricular activities
accessible

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The pie graphs below show the result of a survey of children's activities. The first graph shows the cultural and leisure activities that boys participate in, whereas the second graph shows the activities in which the girls participate.

Some people think that newspaper are best media to learn and get information from, while others believe that internet is a better source.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that living in a high-rise apartment block is a lonely experience because there is no community spirit. Others say that people who live in high-rise apartments have a much better sense of community than those live in houses. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.