Nowadays more and more children play computer games .why do you think this is the case ? is it a positive or negative development

#children #computer #games #case #development

in the modern ,world technology is improving.Most of the technology upbringing in the world.There is a number of

children

Using technological devices and applications

such

computer

games

are the

most

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

favourite applications among

children

. I will discuss

this

topic and whether is it a positive or negative development. I give my opinion.

To begin

with ,these days there are more

children

play

Wrong verb form

playing

show examples

computer

games

Therefore

create a number of positive development around

children

firstly

children

’s Technological skills are improving

whereas

Correct word choice

and

show examples

they can easily handle some technical issues .

secondly

, creativity is increasing and some kids are

encouraging

Wrong verb form

encouraged

show examples

to create new

games

. on the other hand ,there are many kinds of disadvantages connected being

children

playing

computer

games

, In ,addition kids are

addict

Wrong verb form

addicted

show examples

play

computer

games

Then

they missed their School homework .Some

children

are distant from their families

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because more and more use

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

computer

games

.Another thing more kids are facing health issues

such

as physical and mental issues . ,

subsequently

Add a comma

,subsequently

show examples

computer

games

are destroyed

children

’s brains

Add the comma(s)

, therefore,

show examples

therefore

children

have memory loss and some

children

isolated because of

computer

games

as well as

these days ,there are a number of bad

computer

games

created

such

pubgy

Correct your spelling

pudgy

and military

games

then

some students imitate these video

games

and I think it is very dangerous for our society. In conclusion, I will have discussed the positive and negative development of

children

playing

computer

games

.first paragraph discussed the positive impact and the second paragraph discuss the negative impact. ,

However

Add a comma

,However

show examples

I believe that

children

play

computer

games

whereas

different kind of negative impact occurs in

children

’s life.

Submitted by heshanij9 on Fri Aug 18 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

264 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Today, more and more people want things instantly (e.g., goods, service, news,). Why is this? Is it a positive or negative development?
Immediate service is becoming more and more popular among individuals . The writer acknowledges that this is a result of the faster pace of life; hence, it can be considered a negative development.
5.5
band
Young people are often influenced in their behaviours and situations by others in the same age. This is called peer pressure. Do the disadvantages of this issue outweigh advanages of it.
In the cutting-edge era, the young generation is often influenced in their behaviours and situations by others of the same age, known as "peer pressure". From my perspective, the disadvantages of these notions will outweigh their advantages due to various reasons which will be discussed in impending paragraphs.
5
band
Although the prices of fuels have greatly increased over the last decade or two, it is argued that further increases in fuel prices are the only way to reduce world consumption of fuel and lessen pressure on the world`s fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
However, the cost of fuel has been increasing dramatically since one or two decades ago, and some discussions say the growth of fuel costs is the only solution for turning down the use of fuel around the world. I disagree with this opinion for two reasons one, raising the cost of fuel has other irreparable risks for people two, some strata of society might not properly understand the purpose of increasing fuel prices.
<4
band
The media tends to focus on problems rather than positive developments. Some people think that this is harmful to individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Social media is used to show problems and less positive develpment in society. There are people who think that it does not have a good impact in live. This essay is going to support my point of view.
5.5
band
some think increasing business and culural contact between nations is positive. Others think it leads to the dissappearance of national identity. Discuss both Views and state your own opinion.
It is becoming more common for collaboration in the business industry and culture within countries around the world. While some would argue that it can cause the degradation of national identity because other cultures become more popular, I believe that this is a positive movement that can enhance international cooperation in many sectors.

Nowadays more and more children play computer games .why do you think this is the case ? is it a positive or negative development

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Today, more and more people want things instantly (e.g., goods, service, news,). Why is this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Young people are often influenced in their behaviours and situations by others in the same age. This is called peer pressure. Do the disadvantages of this issue outweigh advanages of it.

Although the prices of fuels have greatly increased over the last decade or two, it is argued that further increases in fuel prices are the only way to reduce world consumption of fuel and lessen pressure on the world`s fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The media tends to focus on problems rather than positive developments. Some people think that this is harmful to individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some think increasing business and culural contact between nations is positive. Others think it leads to the dissappearance of national identity. Discuss both Views and state your own opinion.