Nowadays children watch a lot of TV and play video games. However, some people think that activities are not good for a child's mental health. To what extent do yuo agree or disagree?

#children #tv #video #games #people #activities #child #health #yuo

Currently,

children

spend their

time

playing video

games

or watching TV. It is common to believe between people that it is

unhelthy

Correct your spelling

unhealthy

for

children

. From some

point

Add a comma

,point

show examples

I agree but

att

Correct your spelling

show examples

the same

time

there are some points of disagreement. 45 Nowadays

children

have easy availability to video

games

, TV and other media.

Meny

Correct your spelling

Men

families have

Correct article usage

the possibilities

show examples

possibilities

Fix the agreement mistake

possibility

show examples

to buy media equipment for their

children

. As it is known,

children

communicate with friends online or other

programes

Correct your spelling

programmes

programs

. They spend many hours

Change preposition

apply

show examples

playing. Families’ life tempo becoming faster and faster, member of

family

Add an article

the family

show examples

especially

pearents

Correct your spelling

parents

don’t have much

time

to be with each other. Following that, kids are starting to spend more by playing

games

. 73 In my opinion, that can be harmful

for

Change the preposition

show examples

their mental health for lack of social communication. Too much spend

time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

playing

games

or watching videos can be threatening

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

Children

can become angry, tired, 36

Submitted by viktosim on Tue Aug 22 2023

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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0Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

152 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays children watch a lot of TV and play video games. However, some people think that activities are not good for a child's mental health. To what extent do yuo agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Learning a new language at an early age has both advantages and disadvantages. Discuss

Some people believe that the best way to increase road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving cars and motor bikes . To what extent do you agree or disagree?