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Band 5

People living in large cites today face many problem in their everyday life .What are these problems? Should the government encourage people to move to smaller regional towns?

#people #face #life #government #move #towns
Nowadays, there are numerous
problems
appear
Wrong verb form
appearing
show examples
amongst
Change preposition
in
show examples
 societies.
People
 in big
cities
 are likely trapped in the issues related to
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
while
 others who live in
country sides
Correct your spelling
countrysides
show examples
 are living
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 ease.
This
 essay displays my personal point of view of
Correct article usage
the spesific
show examples
spesific
Correct your spelling
specific
problems
 of
this
 and reasons why
people
 need to migrate to other parts of the
cities
. On the one hand, the primary problem that humans in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
metropolitan face today is overpopulation.
People
 have a long journey to deal with
this
issue
 since it has been a
world-wide
Correct your spelling
worldwide
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issue
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 every major
cities
Change to a singular noun
city
show examples
.
Consequently
, another
issue
 like space and housing appears as
people
 tend to settle in one particular area.
The
Correct article usage
An
show examples
 example of
this
 is Mumbai, the capital city of India, which has been overpopulated for years and has affected various aspects; buildings, civils, and
traffics
Correct subject-verb agreement
traffic
show examples
.
Thus
, a regulation to overcome
this
 overwhelming settlement is needed since
this
 problem triggers other
problems
 to exist.
On the other hand
, there is
also
 an
issue
 related to
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being
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 and human-daily-basic needs.
Food
Add an article
The food
show examples
 source is always considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a problem.
This
 scarcity of food is not enough for wide-range
individuals
Change preposition
of individuals
show examples
. What makes it even worse is the availability
medical
Change preposition
of medical
show examples
 professional for
people
 in large
cities
. These medical assistants could barely cover numerous urgencies
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 one time.
Nevertheless
, it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
is extremely crucial for the government to encourage
people
 to
seperate
Correct your spelling
separate
to
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the country sides to resist
further
problems
.
This
 movement should be initiated as the big city recovers from damage. In conclusion, not only do large
cites
Correct your spelling
cities
show examples
 have
problems
 associated with lands and spaces, but big
cities
 today
also
 have
problems
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
 living sources.
That is
 why the government needs to regulate
people
 to move to other regionals and to control them from other major
problems
.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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