The graph below shows the percentage of dependents in 2000 and the predicted figures in 2050 in five countries, and also gives the world average. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main figures and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the percentage of dependents in 2000 and the predicted figures in 2050 in five countries, and also gives the world average. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main figures and make comparisons where relevant.
The given column graph illustrates the
percentage
of
dependents
(children below 15 or adults above 65) in five countries in 2000 and
also
gives projections for 2050. It
also
depicts the world average in the given two years. In 2000, India had the maximum
percentage
of
dependents
(38%), with Japan, Indonesia and China
follows
Wrong verb form
following
show examples
closely behind with around 34% of
dependents
. Korea had the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
percentage
of reliant people (22%). The
overall
world
population
of children below 15 and adults over 65 was 25%. Looking into the future, an increase in the
population
of
dependents
is predicted for Indonesia, Korea, China and Japan.
In contrast
, in ,India the needy
population
is thought to fall from 38% to 32%. In ,Korea the
population
is expected to double by 2050, from 22% to 44%. Approximately 15% rise in
such
population
is predicted for Japan,
whereas
China is thought to show the least increase (2%). The world average of
dependents
is expected to go up from about 25% to nearly 42%.
Overall
, the
percentage
of
dependents
is expected to decrease in India
whereas
in the other four
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
it is projected to increase.
Submitted by raziahassani2002 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, overall, whereas".
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 85%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, dependents, population with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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