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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Nowadays it is easy to apply for and be given a credit card. However, some people experience problems when they are not be able to pay their debts back. In your opinion, do the advantages of credit cards outweigh the disadvantages?

#credit #card #people #debts #cards
Today, thanks to technological advancements, obtaining a
credit
 card is a very easy process ,
however
, some individuals can face hardships when they have to pay their debts back. Personally, I think that the benefits of
credit
 cards outweigh the drawbacks. On the one hand, I consider that there are a number of merits of
credit
 cards. First of all, sometimes people need a huge amount of
money
, because of their problems.
That is
 why, banks and their
credit
 proposals can be beneficial from many aspects
such
 as customers are able to pay return
money
 from 6 months to 3 years with low per cent levels.
Also
, one of the main advantages of
this
 is that you do not need to carry cash and it's an easy electronic payment system.
Furthermore
, if you lose your pocket or if you are mugged by robbers, you can easily and quickly block your bank accounts through their own applications.
On the other hand
,
according to
 my view,
credit
 cards have some demerits that can restrict their usage.
For instance
, they encourage people to spend their
money
 excessively. Thereby, individuals cannot manage their budget and splurge
money
.
Moreover
, if purchasers are not able to pay
money
 back to the banks, almost everyone suffers from
this
. Take an example, those in debt can lose their homes
while
 the banks lose
money
. All of these cause some serious detrimental effects on social and economic fields. In conclusion, I suppose that
due to
 the reasons that I mentioned above, the advantages of having a
credit
 card outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by ismayilovemin530 on

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task response
Expand on the disadvantages of credit cards by providing more specific examples and explaining their impact.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the organization of ideas by using clearer transitions between paragraphs and providing a stronger, more focused introduction and conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • convenience
  • flexibility
  • financial security
  • unexpected expenses
  • rewards and incentives
  • cashback
  • airline miles
  • impulse buying
  • accumulating debt
  • high interest rates
  • minimum payments
  • credit score
  • borrowing capacity
  • reliance
  • saving habits
  • financial vulnerability
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