IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #work #organisation #life #organisations
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Numerous individuals spend their entire careers in
one
Use synonyms
company
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,
while
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 some argue that changing
workplaces
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 is a positive trend. In my opinion, experiencing different organizations offers numerous benefits.
This
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 essay discusses both perspectives, including stability at work and expanding
new
Correct article usage
the new
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 environment. The main advantage of working in
one
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 organization throughout all life is workplace stability. Some
people
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 found it convenient as there
is
Change the verb form
are
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 no big changes at
workplaces
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 . Namely, long-term working in
one
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company
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is
Verb problem
means
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 that travelling to work,
people
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 and
working
Correct article usage
the working
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 system are familiar, which is good for mental health as there is no extra
stresses
Fix the agreement mistake
stress
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.
In addition
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, they may be selected for high positions and many rewards or promotions, contributing to rising career
step
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steps
show examples
.
However
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, changing
work places
Correct your spelling
workplaces
show examples
 have several advantages,
One
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 of the most significant
benefit
Change to a plural noun
benefits
show examples
 is new experience. By working in various companies, individuals take chances
such
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 as meeting new
people
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. developing skills and many more .
Furthermore
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,
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
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help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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 to improve sociability, which is helpful to make process acquaintances faster. Another noticeable advantage of working in various
workplaces
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 is
that
Correct word choice
apply
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financial gains as most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
companies
Add an article
the companies
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 usually
looks
Change the verb form
look
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 for and offer
high
Add an article
a high
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 salary for experienced workers.
This
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 is because
,
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apply
show examples
 these individuals have worked in numerous systems and projects.
Finally
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, the
last
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 reason to change
workplaces
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 for
people
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 is new fresh inspirations,
while
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 working in
one
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company
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 throughout
whole
Correct pronoun usage
their whole
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 life may lead to dissatisfaction and even depression as they might tired
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
monotonous
Correct article usage
the monotonous
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lwork place
Correct your spelling
workplace
. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 stability is a notable advantage of long-term employment in
one
Use synonyms
company
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, the benefits of changing jobs give different experiences, increased earnings and renewed inspiration,
make
Wrong verb form
making
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 it the best career solution
Submitted by Abdu.abetayev on

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task achievement
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear and logical structure.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to make your essay more varied and sophisticated.
grammatical range
Pay attention to your sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Longevity
  • Corporate ladder
  • Adaptability
  • Comfort zone
  • Professional network
  • Diverse skill set
  • Industry exposure
  • Innovation
  • Resilience
  • Seniority
  • Job market
  • Career trajectory
  • Company culture
  • Professional growth
  • Job security
  • Promotion prospects
  • Cross-functional experience
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