Parents should encourage children to spend less time studying and more time doing physical activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#parents #children #time #activities

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The following essay claims that parents should encourage their children to do more sports

instead

Linking Words

of forcing them to spend all their time studying. And I partially agree with

this

Linking Words

statement.

Although

Linking Words

, I concur with the

idea

Use synonyms

that

education

Use synonyms

is quite important, too. That's why I concur with the

idea

Use synonyms

that children should spend time doing both of these activities. First and foremost, I want to mention that

education

Use synonyms

is quite important for the

child

Use synonyms

's future. Good

education

Use synonyms

does not only affect

Use synonyms

child's

Correct article usage

a child's

show examples

future

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

helps them to make their outlook wider. And

this

Linking Words

ability will be important in their adulthood And they would be able to have their opinion and express it.

Because in

Correct word choice

show examples

my opinion,

education

Use synonyms

does not consist only of different kinds of school subjects, it

also

Linking Words

includes finance, the ability

Change preposition

show examples

public

speaking

Wrong verb form

speak

show examples

and expressing one's mind. But I

also

Linking Words

agree with the

idea

Use synonyms

that

sport

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

compulsory for the development of a

child

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, regularly doing

sport

Use synonyms

helps a

person

Use synonyms

to be much healthier and makes a

person

Use synonyms

much stronger.

Also

Linking Words

, it was scientifically proven that doing

sport

Use synonyms

makes your brain work better and age less faster. I think that it is quite important for everyone.

To sum up

Linking Words

, I concur with the

idea

Use synonyms

that the

child

Use synonyms

should not only study

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

sport

Use synonyms

. By combining both of these activities a

child

Use synonyms

would be able healthy, smart and sociable.

Also

Linking Words

, I would like to mention that habits that are built in

Use synonyms

person's

Correct article usage

a person's

show examples

childhood stick to that

person

Use synonyms

until the end of their life. That's why during that period of time you need to build as

much

Change the quantifier

many

show examples

healthy habits as possible.

Submitted by Ayan on Wed Aug 30 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

278 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Physical activity
Development
Concentration
Obesity
Burnout
Sedentary lifestyle
Healthy lifestyle
Intellectual development
Structured activities
Teamwork
Leadership
Sedentary behavior
Tech addiction
Role models
Family bonds

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Do you think that ageing society will disapear? what are the advantages and disadvantages of having more old people in society?
In modern society, there is an argument that the government should raise the tax on sugary products in order to affect the average sugar intake from these goods whose high sugar content causes numerous health problems. From my perspective, I firmly believe that it is not a practical solution to make a decrease in the consumption of sweet food and soft drinks, which will be further explained in the following essay.
4.5
band
Some people think that robots are very important for human’s future development. Others, however, think that robots are a dangerous invention that could have negative effect on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In this contemporary epoch, a large proportion of individuals believe that artifical humans have various advantages to society while critics do not agree and say that it has numerous disastrous effects on the lives of people. According to my viewpoint, it has more benefits in comparision to its drawbacks. This essay will delve into the various reasons behind above scenario and will lead to a logical conclusion as well.
5.5
band
Write about the following topics In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments, Other people think there are benefits If society has more elderly people, To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In my personal opinion, aging population indeed creates problems for governments, and I will express my perspectives in the following paragraph.
4
band
Many people feel it is a waste of money to try to save endangered animal species, for example the tiger or the blue whale. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
There is a consideration that spending cash to the goal to help animals that disappear nowadays such as white tiger or blue whale is useless and unneeded. However, there are a wide range of opinions that contradict that wasting money for charity is a vain. In the following paragraphs, I will attempt to consider both points of view and share my position on necessity of expending wealth on animals needs.
5.5
band
Write about the following topic: In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In the near future, self-driving trend is likely to become popular in the transportation industry. Even now, companies have already been working on developing automatic techniques to assist drivers. It is agreed that the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages. This opinion will be elaborated by discussing how technology can exceed human in driving performances, and the topic of time efficiency.

Parents should encourage children to spend less time studying and more time doing physical activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Do you think that ageing society will disapear? what are the advantages and disadvantages of having more old people in society?

Some people think that robots are very important for human’s future development. Others, however, think that robots are a dangerous invention that could have negative effect on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many people feel it is a waste of money to try to save endangered animal species, for example the tiger or the blue whale. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.