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Writing Samples
Band 5

What is the correlation between greenhouse effect and climate change. What consequences will we face if we fail to control our actions?

#correlation #greenhouse #effect #climate #change #consequences #face #control #actions
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Greenhouse effects and
climate
Use synonyms
 change are becoming more widespread in many parts of the world.
This
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 will examine the correlation between these two factors
as well as
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 the
consequences
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 related to
this
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 tendency. There are a variety of different correlations between these 2 factors.
To begin
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 with, they all affect the
air
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 that not only
people
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,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
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 other species use for respiratory. Because the ozone layer can't protect and filler the breathable
air
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so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
a lot of poison gas would be mixed in, which makes the
air
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being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
harmful to
people
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, animals and plants.
For instance
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: in 2022, the unusable gas had taken more than 30%, which made the respiratory of species become harder,
they
Capitalize word
They
show examples
 showed figures of plants and animals died from losing
air
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 to breathe. Another contributing factor that these two causes bring is the sudden change in
climate
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. Because the ozone layer is punctured,the
climate
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 cycle is reversed, affecting living organisms on Earth.
In addition
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, nature is severely damaged in many ways like soil showing cracks
due to
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 dryness and
lack
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 of water, the ice melts
due to
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 the sudden increase in temperature... Unexpectedly, there are some serious
consequences
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 to be concerned. The first and most important is
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the extinction of many species of the world,
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this
Capitalize word
This
show examples
 causes the earth to lose many rare creatures,
people
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 to lose food sources and the world's wonders to be damaged. Another effect no less important is
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the destruction of humanity
,
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apply
show examples
 because if there is a
lack
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 of inherent food sources, a
lack
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 of
air
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 to breathe,and a
lack
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 of water to detoxify the body,
people
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 will lose all the extremely necessary things.
This
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 has been happening every day,
due to
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people
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's
lack
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 of discipline and responsibility, if we do not fix it, the
consequences
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 will be very unpredictable. In conclusion,
greenhouse
Correct article usage
the greenhouse
show examples
 effect and
climate
Use synonyms
 change are the big problems that
affects
Change the verb form
affect
show examples
 a lot of
people
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 nowadays. If we don't take action, the
consequences
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 would be extremely bad
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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