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Band 4

In the past people liked to store knowledge in books. However, in the present, we prefer to store knowledge on the Internet. Do you think the advantages outweight the disadvantages?

#people #store #books #internet #outweight
Starting with
this
 view.In the past
people
 liked to get
khowledge
Correct your spelling
knowledge
 from books. But nowadays
people
 get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
khowledge
Correct your spelling
knowledge
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
.I think that
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 of storing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
khowledge
Correct your spelling
knowledge
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 more than the disadvantages. I want to start with the advantages of
this
 view. First of
all
Add a comma
,all
show examples
 you can't find all the
information
 in books ,but
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
Internet
Add a comma
,Internet
show examples
 it is very easy to find all the
information
.
For example
 you want to find
information
 about cells you need to find
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
 book and it will
get
Verb problem
save
show examples
your
Correct pronoun usage
you
show examples
 time.
Second
Change the article
The second
show examples
 advantage is that if you want to find more
information
 you can find it
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. Like if you want to find
about
Change preposition
out about
show examples
Correct article usage
a cell
show examples
cell
Fix the agreement mistake
cells
show examples
 you can find everything about it on
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 but in
books
Add a comma
,books
show examples
 you can't find everything you can find general
thing's
Change the noun form
things
thing
show examples
 about
Add an article
the cell
a cell
show examples
cell
Fix the agreement mistake
cells
show examples
.
Secondly
Add a comma
,Secondly
show examples
 I want to talk about its one disadvantage.
This
 disadvantage is that it will
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your health.
Scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
Scientists
show examples
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 proved that if you will use
telephone
Add an article
the telephone
a telephone
show examples
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
 limited time it will
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your
nerve
Replace the word
nervous
show examples
 system and
also
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your eyes.
From
Change preposition
Of
show examples
4,5
milliard
Correct your spelling
million
show examples
people
 1.0%of them given their health . It seems that 1.0% is a small amount, but it is 45 million
people
. In conclusion, I want to say that
Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
 is better for getting
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Information
 you can find anything
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
Internet
 but it has
also
 disadvantages . Because if you learn from
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
 it will cause
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your health
Submitted by psps2021rate on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital literacy
  • Accessibility
  • Multimedia
  • Hyperlinked
  • E-publishing
  • Sustainability
  • Information overload
  • Obsolescence
  • Cybersecurity
  • Digital divide
  • Intellectual property
  • Critical thinking
What to do next:
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