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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The diagram blow shows how rain water is collected and converted to drinking water in an Australian town. Write a report for university lecturer.

The diagram blow shows how rain water is collected and converted to drinking water in an Australian town. Write a report for university lecturer.
#blow #rain #water #australian #town #report #university #lecturer
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This
Linking Words
 linear chart illustrates the method
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, that
Add a missing verb
is use
show examples
use
Replace the word
used
show examples
 to produce fresh
water
Use synonyms
 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rain
Correct your spelling
rainwater
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 in
Australian
Add an article
the Australian
an Australian
show examples
city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
show examples
.
Overall
Linking Words
, four major steps
included
Add a missing verb
were included
show examples
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the process, which started from collecting
rain
Correct your spelling
rainwater
show examples
water
Use synonyms
untill
Correct your spelling
until
 pumping fresh
water
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 the houses.
Initially
Linking Words
,
tanks
Use synonyms
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 located near the houses, which
use
Wrong verb form
were used
show examples
 for collecting rain
water
Use synonyms
, that
falling
Wrong verb form
fell
show examples
 on the roof of the house. After that, the
water
Use synonyms
, which is in the
tanks
Use synonyms
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
being
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 drained through the
water
Use synonyms
 filter using tubes, which have been fixed
bottem
Correct your spelling
bottom
 of the three
tanks
Use synonyms
. In the next step, filtered
water
Use synonyms
 is stored in the
water
Use synonyms
 storage which
located
Add a missing verb
is located
show examples
 next to the filter.
Then
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
water
Use synonyms
suppose
Wrong verb form
is supposed
show examples
 to be sent to
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
another tank, which is placed left side next to the storage,
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to add chemicals
as
Change preposition
for
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 treatment through
pipe
Add an article
a pipe
the pipe
show examples
 that
interconnected
Add a missing verb
is interconnected
show examples
 on the bottom sides of
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both
tanks
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, after adding chemicals from the lid, which
fixed
Add a missing verb
was fixed
show examples
 on the top of the
water
Use synonyms
 treatment tank, clean
water
Use synonyms
distributed
Add a missing verb
was distributed
show examples
 to the houses through tubes, which
connected
Add a missing verb
were connected
show examples
 to the residents from
second
Change the article
the second
show examples
 tank.
Submitted by adpremadasa82 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, tanks with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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