IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The pie chart illustrates the important reasons for farmland
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 less productive and the table represents how these causes affected three regions during the 1990s.
Overall
Linking Words
, in the 1990s, the cause of over-grazing had the
maximum
Correct word choice
highest
show examples
 percentage of
land
Use synonyms
degradation
Use synonyms
 in the world.
Apart from
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, Europe country had the highest proportion of
land
Use synonyms
degradation
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 North America had the lowest share.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, almost one-third of
land
Use synonyms
destruction
Use synonyms
 was
made
Verb problem
caused
show examples
 by over-grazing.
Moreover
Linking Words
, deforestation and over-cultivation had 30% and 28%
degradation
Use synonyms
 respectively. The remaining 7% of
destruction
Use synonyms
 was made by others.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Europe was the nation
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
make
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
 the highest 9.8% deforestation and the total
land
Use synonyms
 degraded by 23%.
Whereas
Linking Words
, Oceania had 11.3% in over-grazing, which
was contribute
Change the verb form
contributed
show examples
13
Change preposition
to 13
show examples
%
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 total
land
Use synonyms
destruction
Use synonyms
. Meanwhile, North America made 3.3%
Use synonyms
land
Change preposition
of land
show examples
degradation
Use synonyms
 in over-cultivation, so
this
Linking Words
 country
was contribute
Change the verb form
contributed
show examples
 only 5%
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the total
destruction
Use synonyms
 of
land
Use synonyms
 which was the lowest proportion.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words land, degradation, destruction with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pie chart
  • Table
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Decreasing productivity
  • Reasons
  • Regional variations
  • Data
  • Summarize
What to do next:
Look at other essays: