The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduates students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008.

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduates students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008.
The bar graph illustrates a number of undergraduate and postgraduates who did not prefer to go full-time after their graduation in 2008.
Overall
, a large proportion of students who came from both sides(excluding full-time work) and were chosen to go for higher studies
in particular
periods of time in the United Kingdom.
To begin
, the first record witnessed without full-time job a plethora of UK undergraduates registered for
further
study at 89,665, followed by part-time workers at 12,735.
Moreover
, some of them were unemployed at 16,235. The remaining proportion of them was doing voluntary work at 3,500 in the UK in the year of 2008.
According to
the data second chart shows most postgraduates were registered in
further
studies approximately 2,725 in the year of 2008. Meanwhile, part-time employees who completed their higher education around 2,535, followed by those who were unemployed at 1,625. it was less than graduates.
Finally
, the least amount of them. interested in voluntary work approximately 345 in the UK in the year of 2008.
Submitted by katrvn.subramaniyan on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further".
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the ninth paragraph.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the ninth paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • pursue
  • enhance
  • skillset
  • gain experience
  • expand knowledge
  • acquire
  • develop
  • employment prospects
  • participate
  • contribute
  • job market
  • seek
  • apply for
  • opportunities
  • gain valuable insights
  • explore
  • unemployment rate
  • entrepreneurship
  • set up
  • initiate
  • establish
  • start a business
  • self-employment
  • chart
  • data
  • statistics
  • graduate
  • postgraduate
  • students
  • college
  • full-time work
  • leaving
  • further studies
  • part-time work
  • internships
  • volunteer work
  • travel
  • starting own business
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