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The two pie charts shows the employment pattern in great Britain in 1992

The two pie charts shows the employment pattern in great Britain in 1992
#two #employment #pattern #britain
The pie charts depict how
much
Correct word choice
high
show examples
percentage
 of
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
worked
Correct pronoun usage
who worked
show examples
 in Manual and Non-manual
jobs
 in
great
Capitalize word
Great
show examples
 Britain in the year 1992.
Overall
 maximum
percentage
 of women worked in Clerical or related
jobs
whereas
 the highest number of
men
 had Managerial and Professional roles.
Firstly
, in craft or similar employment , both
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 had nearly
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
percentage
 of people
worked
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
around 27%. Only 6%
men
Change preposition
of men
show examples
 worked in clerical or related
jobs
 on
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand
this
 job contributed to the maximum
percentage
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 women.General labourers had only 1% of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 and 2% of
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
woked
Verb problem
working
show examples
 and
thus
this
 role had the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
percentage
 of people worked in both male and female side 36% of boys worked in Managerial and Professional roles
however
 only 29% of girls had
this
 role.
Other
Change preposition
In other
show examples
 manual roles
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
24% of
men
 worked
however
 in females only 3% worked . 6%
men
Change preposition
of men
show examples
 and 9%
women
Change preposition
of women
show examples
 had other non-manual
jobs
.
Submitted by kavitha7797 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, jobs, men with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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