These days, we are seeing an increasing amount of violence on television, and this is having a negative impact on children's behaviour. Do you agree or disagree?

#amount #violence #television #impact #children #behaviour

In today’s time,

Television

is one of the major sources of entertainment among people. Increased televising of violent programs is considered to have a negative impact on

children

’s

behaviour

. I totally agree with the statement since

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

children

are influenced by what they see.

To begin

with, it can be said that every other T.V. channel promotes disturbing graphics that make

children

believe that it is normal to do and see violent

behaviour

. As I can remember in my village, two brothers were playing the roles of police and thief, and one, stab the other with a knife to death, causing lifelong trauma for the family.

This

means that

children

want to recreate what they see on screens without considering about consequences. Because they are not old enough to differentiate between right and wrong

Rephrase

apply

show examples

hence

, their bad

behaviour

seems all right to them.

Similarly

, glorifying bloodshed in movies promotes the ideology that to look cool or strong among their peers and friends especially teenagers they have to display aggression towards others.

For instance

, young people full of energy and stamina like to sort things out with fights like they see on

television

However

, they forget that every problem can be sorted by talking peacefully but

that is

not depicted in

television

Hence

, the negative

behaviour

is prevalent in young individuals.

To conclude

, it can be said that

television

program promotes violent

behaviour

among young people, as

children

are unable to differentiate between right and wrong and in many cases, teenagers think it is cool to be aggressive which proves that televising violence is having a bad influence on

children

Submitted by singhjagdeep94 on Fri Sep 15 2023

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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These days, we are seeing an increasing amount of violence on television, and this is having a negative impact on children's behaviour. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think the government should not spend on international aid because there are disadvantaged people in their own countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Some people enjoy working alone. Others would rather work in a group. What is your preference? Explain why.

Some children spend hours every day on the smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people believe that it is better to live in a city than in a rural area. Others argue that life in the countryside is preferable. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.