Some people say that outdoor activities benefit children’s development rather than computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #activities #benefit #children’s #development #computer #games

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There is no doubt that these days, we are living in

advanced

Correct article usage

an advanced

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technology era. Some

people

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argue that electronic

games

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may impact children's development and should replaced by helpful methods

such

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as outdoor

activities

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.In the following paragraphs, I will discuss both views and provide my point of view. First of all, computer

games

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have a lot of disadvantages that could affect on

brain

Fix the agreement mistake

brains

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human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

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,especially children . It is undeniable that many

people

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spend more hours in front of the television or screen.

Additionally

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,sitting in an incorrect position in front of these devices may result in a painful injury to the backbone, and neck.

For instance

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,some video

games

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have violent content

such

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as killing

people

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or damaging the public's cars.

This

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will encourage

people

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to commit crimes.

Furthermore

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,health problems may arise like obesity

as a result

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of a lack of physical activity .

On the contrary

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, I strongly believe

that is

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,outdoor

activities

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have countless benefits for both brain and physical body development.

Firstly

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, at the developmental stage ,children always need

activities

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that help to grow their intellectual skills and enhance body function .

Secondly

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,parental responsibility is to ensure that their kids are not exposed to stress by doing physical

activities

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like jumping .

This

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will allow the child's energy to be released.

Last

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but not least, motor

activities

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allow the child to improve communication skills with their peers. To summarize,video

games

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are harmful to human

wellbeing

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well-being

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.Violent content may be displayed on computer

games

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and that encourages violation among humans .

While

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outdoor entertainment has countless benefits for humans physically,mentally,and communicational , especially for teenagers.

Submitted by du.sg16 on Sat Sep 16 2023

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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Some people say that outdoor activities benefit children’s development rather than computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The use of social media, e.g. Facebook and Twitter, is replacing face-to-face contact for many people in everyday life. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that the government should decide which subject should study at the university, while others think that students should be allowed to apply for the subject they prefer. Discuss the two views and give your opinion.

The only way to reduce drug is to legalise the substances and bring them under control. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statements? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

You are leaving a job and coming back to your hometown. Write a letter to your friend and say : 1. What is the reason for your leaving 2. What do you plan to do 3. Where an when will you meet your friend to discuss it?