IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

the bar chart below shows the top ten countrie for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014

the bar chart below shows the top ten countrie for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014
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The provided bar chart illustrates the amount of electricity production and consumption in the United States, China, Russia, Japan, India, Canada, France, Brazil, Germany and Korea in the given year 2014.
Overall
Linking Words
, almost all countries had higher electricity production than usage except Germany. China and the United States were producing and using large amounts of energy,
while
Linking Words
 Korea Rep was the least amount of its kind in the given year.
Additionally
Linking Words
, 5398
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
 of power was made by China and they used 5322
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
 in the same year.
As well as
Linking Words
 the US produced and consumed around 4000
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, Russia, Japan and India delivered 1057, 936 and 871
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
 of power respectively, so 1038, 856 and 658
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
 were used by them respectively.
Finally
Linking Words
, Germany consumed 526
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
,
although
Linking Words
 they made a total energy (of 582
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
) which was less than consumption.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words billion, kwh with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • gigawatt hours (GWh)
  • renewable energy sources
  • non-renewable energy sources
  • industrialization
  • economic activities
  • carbon footprint
  • sustainability
  • energy efficiency
  • power generation
  • grid capacity
  • energy policies
  • consumption patterns
  • energy demand
  • production-consumption disparity
  • environmental impact
  • greenhouse gas emissions
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