IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
time
Use synonyms
 working grown-ups spend on various activities in a specific country in 1958 and 2008 is represented by the pie charts below.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is obvious that despite some changes in the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
time
Use synonyms
 spent on other activities, work has appeared to have the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 over the years. The
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
time
Use synonyms
 working increased dramatically from 33% in 1958 to 42% in 2008.
As well as
Linking Words
 the gradual increase in relaxing
time
Use synonyms
 at home from 8% in 1958 to 13% in 2008.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, a slight increase occurred in the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
time
Use synonyms
 spent on other interests from 6% in 1958 to
reach
Verb problem
apply
show examples
8% in 2008.
Moreover
Linking Words
, The
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
time
Use synonyms
 taken in travelling to work rose from 2% in 1958 to 8% in 2008.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Sleeping
time
Use synonyms
 steeply decreased from 32% in 1958 to 25% in 2008.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the
time
Use synonyms
percentage
Use synonyms
 spent on going out with family and friends fiercely decreased from 19% to 6% in 2008.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, time with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 7 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: