You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Many countries have compulsory military service for young men after they leave school. It would be a good idea for all countries to adopt this system for men, and possibly for women too. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.
One
of the most recent trend
Change to a plural noun
trends
of
today’s world is the compulsory military service after Change preposition
in
leave
school for young men. From Wrong verb form
leaving
this
Fix the agreement mistake
training
trainings
government tries to build a lawful and healthy young generation Add a comma
,trainings
to
Change preposition
in
country
. It is a good move if we can adopt Correct article usage
the country
training
system for Correct article usage
a training
women
also
. Because now most of the big institutions lead
by Wrong verb form
are led
women
. This
shows women
becoming
Verb problem
have
big
role Correct article usage
a big
on
society as same as men.
In my perspective Change preposition
in
provide
military training for Wrong verb form
providing
women
has more positive impact than negatives.
When I consider about positive
side of the training Add an article
the positive
to
them, Change preposition
for
most
prominent Correct article usage
the most
one
is they can become mentally and physically fit. They can learn the way how to maintain their physically
and Replace the word
physical
mentally strong
. Not only that they can have knowledge about the Replace the word
mental strength
self defensive
methods. And Add a hyphen
self-defensive
also
they can make new friends all over the country. This
will help them to strength
their Replace the word
strengthen
carrier
path by having Correct your spelling
career
connection
all over the country and Fix the agreement mistake
connections
varies
industries.
On the Replace the word
various
one
hand may point out some drawbacks also
. Because,
some Remove the comma
apply
women
may have physical and mentally
issues when Change the word
mental
hey
were in childhood. These issues can grow during the training period. Because military training is Correct your spelling
they
a
hard training Correct article usage
apply
compare
to other Wrong verb form
compared
trainings
. Change the wording
training
pieces of training
Actually
it is the most significant drawback.
Add a comma
,Actually
Lastly
, in whole
world is focusing Change the article
the whole
to educate
citizens to create Change preposition
on educating
Correct article usage
a healthy
healthy
and efficient Correct article usage
a healthy
work force
. So Correct your spelling
workforce
this
step of providing military training for young
generation will help to achieve that target.
In the view of Correct article usage
the young
argument
outlined above, Correct article usage
the argument
one
can conclude that despite having some drawbacks the benefit of providing military training for both men and women
will higher
than without Add a missing verb
be higher
trainings
.Change the wording
training
pieces of training
Submitted by skdikshan on
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Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.