With the help of the Internet and television many people are becoming famous. Is this a positive or a negative trend?

#help #internet #television #people #trend

this

modern and digital era, many individuals become

celebrities

by posting videos on

Youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

and participating in reality shows on Television. In my perspective,

this

is definitely a positive development to become popular and succeed in

carees

Correct your spelling

careers

career

prospective

Correct your spelling

perspective

show examples

. To commence with, television and

socia

Correct your spelling

social

media platforms are the best platforms to showcase talents and skills.

For instance

, Every day many youngsters and adults get fame by posting their dancing or music videos.

Also

, many artists perform in different television shows and impress audiences

Change preposition

with

show examples

their acting skills.

Moreover

, in today's time, younger generations follow

celebrities

and sports personalities and make them their

rolemodels

Correct your spelling

role models

to become

successfull

Correct your spelling

successful

in life.

In addition

, many individuals

not

Add a missing verb

are not

show examples

only

recognize

Wrong verb form

recognised

show examples

in society but

also

living

Wrong verb form

live

show examples

a higher standard and luxurious life.

On the other hand

celebrities

can not live like a normal citizen. Followers and

medias

Correct your spelling

media

show examples

are always

interrupted

Wrong verb form

interrupting

show examples

their personal lives.

Furthermore

, sometimes many

celebrities

or famous personalities have

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

become victims of critics or other people by

makeing

Correct your spelling

making

inappropriate statements or comments on social media.

Thus

, sometimes fame and glory will compromise privacy and negatively impact on personal life and relationships. In conclusion,

interenet

Correct your spelling

Internet

and

televisions

Fix the agreement mistake

television

show examples

are the best and the coolest ways to get fame and become popular.

Submitted by bhavsar.urvashi on Tue Oct 03 2023

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coherence cohesion

Expand on your main points and provide more specific examples to support your ideas.

task achievement

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lexical resource

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grammatical range accuracy

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

207 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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With the help of the Internet and television many people are becoming famous. Is this a positive or a negative trend?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Today, the quality of life in large cities is decreasing. Discuss the causes and solutions.

Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive in school. Others, however, say that cooperation and team working skills are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Students perform better in school when they are rewarded rather than punished. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Aircraft have been increasingly used for transport fruit and vegetable to some country where such plants hardly grow or are out of season. Some people consider it a good idea, but some people oppose it. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.