The pie chart below shows the number of native speakers of different languages in canada in 1996, 2006 and 2016.

The pie chart below shows the number of native speakers of different languages in canada in 1996, 2006 and 2016.
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Due to
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reasons like
immgrant
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immigrant
immigrants
and
goverment
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government
policy,there is an obvious
change
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in the number of
native
Add an article
a native
the native
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speaker
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speakers
show examples
in
Canada
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, which can be indicated from the pie chart above. From the pie chart above, we can find that from 1980 to 1990,the
English
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number of English
show examples
native speakers had
decrease
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decreased
show examples
by 15%.By
constract
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contrast
,natives
speaked
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speaking
Chinese
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increase
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increased
show examples
from 9% to 11%,and those who
speak
Wrong verb form
spoke
show examples
Urdu had
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increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
from 15% to 28%,which is a dramatic
increase
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. Whether the
change
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in the number of native speakers of
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a deferent
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deferent
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different
show examples
language a good thing
of
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or
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a bad one?I think the answer is
posivite
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positive
.
Although
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the native English
speaker's
Change noun form
speakers
show examples
decreasing
Verb problem
apply
show examples
may
change
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people's language
enviorment
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environment
,which could make people
get
Verb problem
apply
show examples
less familiar with the conservation they live
,
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in,this
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this
Linking Words
change
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can bring
graet benifit
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great benefits
as well.
Firstly
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,the
increase
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of
Change preposition
in
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Chinese speakers showed that there was a
trendency
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tendency
for Chinese to move
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
Canada
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,which could help add to
Canada
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's cultural diversity and break down the language barrier between natives in
Canada
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and the world.
Besides
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,the residents who
speaked
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speak
Urdu
increase
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could
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
great
Change the word
greatly
show examples
help to maintain
Canada
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's own civilisation and add
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
sense of
belongings
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belonging
show examples
for the local people.
And in
Correct word choice
In
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political
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the political
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aspect,
this
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change
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meant that local residents' power in deciding national
affair
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affairs
show examples
and making policy may
increase
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.Because the
barriar
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barrier
from outer had
decrese
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decrease
decreased
as well. We can find a lot of information
form
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from
show examples
pie
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the pie
show examples
chart,not only the numbers,but
also
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the
reason
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reasons
show examples
and facts
behine
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behind
it.And
Canada
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's government ought to make some
solution
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solutions
show examples
due to
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these changes.
Submitted by asllchkied on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "due to".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words change, canada, increase with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 6 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 5 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • native speakers
  • pie chart
  • number
  • different languages
  • Canada
  • 1996
  • 2006
  • 2016
  • overall trends
  • comparison
  • increase
  • decrease
  • majority
  • minority
  • significant
  • notable
  • significant
  • share
  • dominant
  • diverse
  • linguistic landscape
  • shift
  • evolution
  • data
  • percentage
  • proportion
  • graphical representation
  • pattern
  • change
  • fluctuation
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