IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

the graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car bus or train between 1970 and 2030

the graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car bus or train between 1970 and 2030
#uk #commuters #car #bus #train
The line chart elucidates the number of UK commuters travelling on a regular basis in three popular vehicles namely
car
,
bus
 and
train
. In general,
while
 the total
quanties
Correct your spelling
number
 of individuals who travel by
car
 and
train
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 predicted to witness an increasing trend over the period, the opposite side is
forcasted
Correct your spelling
forecasted
 to be true for that of
Bus
. In 1970,
Car
Correct article usage
the Car
show examples
 was the most prevalent
mean
Fix the agreement mistake
means
show examples
 of transport for commuters in the UK, which accounted for 5
million
 , 2 and 4
million
 higher than those of
Bus
Correct article usage
the Bus
show examples
 and
Train
 respectively. In the next thirty years,
while
 around 7
million
 people use
car
Add an article
the car
a car
show examples
 to transport and exactly 3
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
Train
, the figure for
Bus
 dwindled slightly to nearly 3
million
 during the time depicted. By 2030, the number of commuters
travel
Wrong verb form
travelling
show examples
 by
car
 is expected to have a dramatic
escaltion
Correct your spelling
escalation
 to 9
million
, and that of
Train
 is forecasted to surge to 5
million
.
Conversely
, the figure for
Bus
 is foreseen to plummet and terminate at 3
million
 people.
Submitted by ruozzo3095 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words car, bus, train, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: