Nowadays both men and women spend a lot of money on beauty care. This was not so in the past. What may be the root cause of this behaviour? Discuss the reasons and possible results.

#men #women #money #beauty #care #was #root #behaviour #results

For the time being, the

beauty

industry is the one in which

hefty

Correct article usage

a hefty

show examples

amount is

spend

Change the form of the verb

spent

show examples

by both males and females as compared to the past expenditure.The root causes and

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

consequences will be

dicussed

Correct your spelling

discussed

in the upcoming paragraphs.

Although

there are many reasons

Change preposition

for

show examples

overspending on

beauty

products, the most prominent is to imitate the actors and

actress

Fix the agreement mistake

actresses

show examples

. To explicate, the advertisements of

well known

Add a hyphen

well-known

show examples

brands leave their unforgettable image in the minds of individuals,that's why

instead

of using

homeremidies

Correct your spelling

home remedies

, they just follow their role

moodel

Correct your spelling

model

models

For instance

, the prominent company Olay promoted their product under eye brightening cream, youngones

trust

Wrong verb form

trusted

show examples

these commercials blindly,

for

Correct word choice

and for

show examples

this

they

make

Wrong verb form

made

show examples

the purchase. Another reason is Job opportunities because

asthetic

Correct your spelling

aesthetic

beauty

is appreciated by everyone

especially

Add the comma(s)

,especially

show examples

in the

pofession

Correct your spelling

position

of cashier, travel

agents

Fix the agreement mistake

agent

show examples

etc.

Thus

, for the improvement in

personality

Add a comma

,personality

show examples

these

proucts

Correct your spelling

products

are used. The ramifications of these materials

leads

Change the verb form

lead

show examples

to the loss of natural

beauty

, the commercialized products by themselves are rarely used by

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

famous personalities;

however

,the youngsters opt for

beauty

surgerioes

Correct your spelling

surgeries

due to

being presented and supported by their

exampler

Correct your spelling

example

. But, these treatments actually hurt their skin and

consequently

become dull.

Moreover

in order to support these things ,they overspend the money which should be utilized for education, paying

mortages

Correct your spelling

mortgages

rent

Correct word choice

and rent

show examples

Therefore

, their

hardwork

Correct your spelling

hard work

going

Verb problem

becoming

show examples

redundant as it's not only hurting their body,

also

Correct word choice

but also

show examples

putting their future in hardship.

To conclude

, to appreciate and follow

some one

Correct your spelling

someone

show examples

fruteful

Correct your spelling

fruitful

nevertheless

firstly

the implications of these treatments or merchandise should be done before trying,

otherwise

it may permanently affect the skin.

Submitted by mdkaur84 on Thu Oct 05 2023

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

262 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays both men and women spend a lot of money on beauty care. This was not so in the past. What may be the root cause of this behaviour? Discuss the reasons and possible results.

Fully explain your ideas

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

More and more people are using internet to do their tasks rather that doing in person for example shopping bankings hotel bookings. Do you think tha advantage outweigh disadvantage

Some people claim that it is acceptable to use animals in medical research for the benefit of human beings, while other people argue that it is wrong. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Shopping is now one of the most famous forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. What is the reason? Is it positive or negative

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing games together is a good way to build closer relationships. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. Be sure to use your own words. Do not use memorized examples.