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Band 5.5

Students from disadvantaged families and rural areas are finding it difficult to gat a university education. Some people believe that universities should help them. To what extent do you agree or diasgree?

#students #families #areas #gat #university #education #people #universities #diasgree
In many countries, many underprivileged
students
 are not able to achieve higher
education
 in
universities
due to
 critical financial situations or
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
 of
universities
 or college
facilities
 in rural areas. To combat
this
 situation, many experts believe that
universities
 should arrange
facilities
 by giving scholarships or free
education
 for those
students
. In my perspective,
universities
 and other educational institutions should come forward and help them to get
education
Add an article
an education
show examples
. To commence with,
universities
 and
government
 should take
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
essential measures to improve educational
facilities
 for disadvantaged families and remote areas. First of all,
universities
 and
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should make
a special reservation seats
Correct the article-noun agreement
a special reservation seat
special reservation seats
show examples
 or
quota
Fix the agreement mistake
quotas
show examples
 for all those
students
, so they will get higher
education
.
Secondly
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should increase
number
Change the article
the number
show examples
 of new
government
 colleges and
universities
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 each part of countries and
make
Verb problem
provide
show examples
 free
education
 for all
students
,so
any
Correct determiner usage
all
show examples
students
 can get
education
Correct article usage
an education
show examples
 from their hometown without worrying about tuition fees.
Furthermore
,
universities
 should combine with other
non- profit
Correct your spelling
non-profit
show examples
 organizations and make programmes to spread awareness about
importance
Add an article
the importance
show examples
 of higher
education
 in today's modern and competitive world.
In addition
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should make strict rules and regulations and offer
universities
 to achieve specific
target
Fix the agreement mistake
targets
show examples
 from
this
 background.
Thus
, all
students
 can get
education
Add an article
an education
show examples
 without any kinds of barriers. In conclusion, it is
undeniable
Add an article
an undeniable
the undeniable
show examples
 truth that still, many young and talented
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
 are not able to achieve
Correct article usage
a universities
show examples
universities
Change the noun form
university
show examples
education
due to
 poverty and lack of educational
facilities
.
Hence
, I strongly agree with the statement that
universities
 should provide scholarships and
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should facilitate free
education
 to all underprivileged
students
 as
education
 is a
basis
Replace the word
basic
show examples
 right for all citizens.
Submitted by bhavsar.urvashi on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Use more linking words to improve coherence and cohesion.
grammatical range and accuracy
Watch out for punctuation errors.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • disadvantaged families
  • rural areas
  • university education
  • scholarships
  • financial aid
  • allocate
  • seats
  • outreach programs
  • support services
  • succeed
  • collaborate
  • governmental organizations
  • opportunities
  • targeted policies
  • initiatives
  • challenges
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