Harry kovacs is a 5 year old boy who is the son of one of your newly referred patients in the community mental health centre where you are a mental health case manager.

#kovacs #year #boy #son #patients #community #health #centre #case #manager

I am writing to refer master harry who

has

Verb problem

show examples

suspected

have

Wrong verb form

of having

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separation anxiety disorder .He requires your care and

futher

Correct your spelling

further

assessment. Harry started to show some signs of separation anxiety after his

mother

Mrs.Elizabeth hospital admission,

Who has

Verb problem

apply

show examples

had major depression and psychotic features.

she

Capitalize word

She

show examples

was admitted

Change preposition

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hospital

Correct article usage

the hospital

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for dsh attempt.Recently he cries and panics whenever his

mother

leaves his sight .He was

social

Change the adjective

socially

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withdrawn and

refusing

Wrong verb form

refused

show examples

to attend

kindergarden

Correct your spelling

kindergarten

In addition

to that he has increased

insomia

Correct your spelling

insomnia

and

nightmare

Fix the agreement mistake

nightmares

show examples

.He has preoccupied thoughts regarding his

mother

Change noun form

mother's

show examples

daily activities and that she might leave him again. Harry lives with his

mother

and father .His father was

self employed

Add a hyphen

self-employed

show examples

and rarely

visit

Wrong verb form

visited

show examples

to house.Harry states that his father

Change the verb form

does

show examples

not like him.

Correct your spelling

show examples

has had medical history of eczema. I would highly

appreciated

Change the verb form

appreciate

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

it if

show examples

you could do an assessment for

harry

Capitalize word

Harry

show examples

and manage his condition.Kindly make an arrangement for

joint

Add an article

a joint

the joint

show examples

meeting with

case

Add an article

a case

the case

show examples

manager and his

mother

. If you have any

queriers

Correct your spelling

queries

show examples

please don't hesitate to contact me. yours sincerely, case manager.

Submitted by insighttribez on Fri Oct 06 2023

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structure

The introduction and conclusion are missing. Please add them to provide a clear and structured essay.

content

Ensure that all the relevant information is included and clearly explained.

content

Provide more specific examples and details to support your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

168 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Harry kovacs is a 5 year old boy who is the son of one of your newly referred patients in the community mental health centre where you are a mental health case manager.

Fully explain your ideas

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think is a positive or a negative development?

Some people say that the experiences a child has before starting school have the most influence on their future life. Others say that experiences as a teenager, especially at school, are more influential. Discuss both views and give your own opinion?

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?