IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

The take below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

#take #information #railway #systems #six #cities #summarise #features #comparisons
The table shows information about the
train
 system in six cities
in
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apply
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around the world.
Overall
, the first
railway
 and the longest
railyway
Correct your spelling
railway
systems
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system
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 in the
europe
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Europe
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 countries.
On the other hand
, the underground
train
systems
 in the US are mostly new and the shorter
railway
. In terms of the
train
systems
 in London, the first operation of
this
railway
systems
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system
show examples
 was in 1863 and
then
 the
lenght
Correct your spelling
length
 of the
railway
 at 394
km
. The
train
passenger
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passengers
show examples
 of
this
train
 more or less passengers by around 775
millions
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million
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 per year.
Following
this
, Paris and Tokyo were
similiary
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similar
similarly
at
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to
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 the same figures. Date opened of these
railway
systems
 in 1900 and 1927.
Moreover
, the routes of the
train
systems
built
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are built
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 at around 199
km
 and 155
km
repectively
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respectively
. And
then
, the most
passenger
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passengers
show examples
 who travelled by
train
more
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were more
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 than 1000
millions
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million
show examples
 or the highest
passenger
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number of passengers
show examples
 among those countries.
Furthermore
, the
train
 system in Washington DC built in 1976. The
lenght
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length
 of
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the trains
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trains
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train
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 system was 126
km
.
Therefore
,
at
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apply
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around 144
millions
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million
show examples
of
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apply
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passengers per year
who
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apply
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rode
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ride
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 by underground
train
. After that, the shorter
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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train
systems
 in Kyoto and Los Angeles
was
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were
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 11
km
 and 28
km
repectively
Correct your spelling
respectively
. Indeed, the total
passenger
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number of passengers
show examples
 of these countries at around 45
millions
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million
show examples
 and 55
millions
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million
show examples
 per year.
Submitted by haloalwan on

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Introduction and Conclusion
The introduction and conclusion are missing. Please ensure that your essay has a clear introduction that introduces the topic and provides an overview of the main features, and a conclusion that summarizes the main points and makes comparisons where relevant.
Supported Main Points
Make sure to provide clear support for your main points. You can do this by including specific details and examples.
Word Count
Your essay does not meet the word count requirement of at least 150 words.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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