IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The take below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Introduction
The table shows information about the
train
Use synonyms
 system in six cities
in
Change preposition
apply
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around the world.
Overall
Linking Words
, the first
railway
Use synonyms
 and the longest
railyway
Correct your spelling
railway
Use synonyms
systems
Fix the agreement mistake
system
show examples
 in the
europe
Change the capitalization
Europe
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 countries.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the underground
train
Use synonyms
systems
Use synonyms
 in the US are mostly new and the shorter
railway
Use synonyms
.
Body paragraph 1
In terms of the
train
Use synonyms
systems
Use synonyms
 in London, the first operation of
this
Linking Words
railway
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
systems
Fix the agreement mistake
system
show examples
 was in 1863 and
then
Linking Words
 the
lenght
Correct your spelling
length
 of the
railway
Use synonyms
 at 394
km
Use synonyms
. The
train
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
passenger
Fix the agreement mistake
passengers
show examples
 of
this
Linking Words
train
Use synonyms
 more or less passengers by around 775
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
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 per year.
Following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, Paris and Tokyo were
similiary
Correct your spelling
similar
similarly
at
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to
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 the same figures. Date opened of these
railway
Use synonyms
systems
Use synonyms
 in 1900 and 1927.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the routes of the
train
Use synonyms
systems
Use synonyms
built
Add a missing verb
are built
show examples
 at around 199
km
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 and 155
km
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repectively
Correct your spelling
respectively
. And
then
Linking Words
, the most
Use synonyms
passenger
Fix the agreement mistake
passengers
show examples
 who travelled by
train
Use synonyms
more
Add a missing verb
were more
show examples
 than 1000
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 or the highest
Use synonyms
passenger
Fix the agreement mistake
number of passengers
show examples
 among those countries.
Conclusion
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
train
Use synonyms
 system in Washington DC built in 1976. The
lenght
Correct your spelling
length
 of
Correct article usage
the trains
show examples
trains
Change the noun form
train
show examples
 system was 126
km
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
around 144
Use synonyms
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
passengers per year
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
rode
Replace the word
ride
show examples
 by underground
train
Use synonyms
. After that, the shorter
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
train
Use synonyms
systems
Use synonyms
 in Kyoto and Los Angeles
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 11
km
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 and 28
km
Use synonyms
repectively
Correct your spelling
respectively
. Indeed, the total
Use synonyms
passenger
Fix the agreement mistake
number of passengers
show examples
 of these countries at around 45
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 and 55
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 per year.

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Introduction and Conclusion
The introduction and conclusion are missing. Please ensure that your essay has a clear introduction that introduces the topic and provides an overview of the main features, and a conclusion that summarizes the main points and makes comparisons where relevant.
Supported Main Points
Make sure to provide clear support for your main points. You can do this by including specific details and examples.
Word Count
Your essay does not meet the word count requirement of at least 150 words.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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