IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

Someone says that job satisfaction is more important than job security, but others disagree. Discuss both views and address which one do you agree.

#someone #job #satisfaction #security #address
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Nowadays, people tend to seek
a
Correct article usage
apply
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work
Use synonyms
 that can get them happiness, both happiness
of
Change preposition
in
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working
Correct pronoun usage
their working
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 life and happiness in
personal
Correct pronoun usage
their personal
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 life.
That is
Linking Words
 the reason why career satisfaction is the ideal topic that people more focusing on significantly, not just only career security like in past. Personally, I agree
with
Change preposition
that
show examples
 to happy with
work
Use synonyms
 is more significant
more to
Rephrase
than being
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 secure with
work
Use synonyms
. In my opinion,
bacause
Correct your spelling
because
 of my young age, I think I would like to try to
work
Use synonyms
 and learn in various industries.
Becuase
Correct your spelling
Because
that is
Linking Words
 the way I can expand my skillsets and
expore
Correct your spelling
explore
 the passion of
work
Use synonyms
 I
truely
Correct your spelling
truly
 love.
Hence
Linking Words
, to
happy
Add a missing verb
be happy
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 with
work
Use synonyms
 in meaning
job
Correct article usage
the job
show examples
 is more significant for me in the present.
Furthurmore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, I believe that If I could discover my real passion
of
Change preposition
for
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work
Use synonyms
. I am going to do it in a better way.
Submitted by tah.siwakorn on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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