IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

International tourism has brought enormous benefit to many places. At the same time,there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages?

#tourism #benefit #places #time #concern #impact #inhabitants #environment
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In the modern world,
tourism
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 is becoming
one
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 of the largest spheres of human life. At the same
time
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time,
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 it can bring both benefits and
threat
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threats
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. In the following
paragraphs
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paragraphs,
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 we will be able to look at both sides.
Firstly
Linking Words
, international
tourism
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 can
bring for
Verb problem
improve
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 the host
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country
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country's
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 economical benefit. When a tourist wants to come to a
country
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,
firstly
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,
this
Linking Words
 person must pay for tickets. After arrival - for housing, for food, etc. If
this
Linking Words
 person leaves
this
Linking Words
country
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 with good expressions, he can recommend
this
Linking Words
country
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 to other
people
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.
This
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 is the order in which the
tourism
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 cycle occurs.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
one
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 of the most
noticable
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noticeable
notable
 advantages of international
tourism
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 is cultural exchange. By visiting some
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country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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, travellers can feel the culture of other
nation
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nations
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
huge
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a huge
the huge
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 amount of tourists can bring cultural erosion in
local
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the local
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 area. They will
start
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start to
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 forget about their traditions, losing their language,
cultural
Correct word choice
and cultural
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 knowledge.
For example
Linking Words
, we can show the island
country
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 of Papua New Guinea which is located in the Pacific
ocean
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Ocean
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. There
left
Verb problem
is
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 a small number of
people
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 who
knows
Correct subject-verb agreement
know
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 their local language. For
one
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 more
disadvatage
Correct your spelling
disadvantage
, we can show the increasing the price of cost, especially for living places. It can bring difficulties for provincial
people
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 to live there. So, they start to leave places, full of tourists and live in the
countrysides
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countryside
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. In conclusion, there are enough advantages and disadvantages
on
Change preposition
to
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 international
tourism
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. In my opinion, it can be good for countries to invite tourists but with
one
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 clause. Local
people
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 and traditions shouldn't be damaged.
Submitted by croownguuard on

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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay could be improved by organizing the points more effectively.
task achievement
Provide a clear thesis statement that clearly states your view on whether the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points.
lexical resource
Use more varied vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance your lexical resource and grammatical range and accuracy scores.
grammatical range accuracy
Make sure to proofread your essay and fix any grammatical errors.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • enormous benefit
  • impact
  • local inhabitants
  • environment
  • disadvantages
  • outweigh
  • advantages
  • economic benefits
  • job creation
  • cultural exchange
  • infrastructure development
  • promotion
  • local products
  • environmental impact
  • exploitation
  • resources
  • cultural erosion
  • increased cost of living
  • overcrowding
  • congestion
  • balancing
  • benefits
  • disadvantages
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